How to Make Friends and Alienate People

"Any search for a new ballpark site needs to explore all of the Tampa Bay region. This is what we repeated to Mayor Foster today. We thanked him for his gesture, and we conveyed to him again that we will consider sites in St. Petersburg and Gateway when we are considering all potential sites in Tampa Bay." - Matt Silverman, Tampa Bay Rays Team President

With that statement, Stuart Sternberg and his team of upper managers have not only said both Tropicana Field and downtown St. Petersburg are done, but they also want nothing to do with Pinellas County at this point, as well. He and his associates have managed to insult, degrade, and belittle the team's only allies for the last 13 years. Tampa has said repeatedly that they cannot and will not pay for a stadium on their side of the Bay, yet he continues to push the issue. Why, knowing all that, would be tempted to bite the hand that feeds him?

Almost three years ago, the then-Devil Rays gave us fans two things to cheer for: a new name and color scheme, as well as plans for a new, waterfront, open-air ballpark right in the heart of St. Petersburg. It was a technological marvel, promising the freedom of open-air baseball, with fresh breezes off the Bay and air-conditioned corridors to keep the temperature in check, and the protection of a weatherproof fabric retractable roof that would blend seamlessly into the skyline and prevent inevitable rainouts. It would be built on the longtime home of Spring Training in St. Pete, Al Lang Field, a place where baseball was played for three generations. Great teams from the Miracle Mets, Ozzie Smith's Cards, eight of the Yankees' championship teams, and the 1951 NY Giants' pennant winners, not counting all the teams that played on this hallowed ground as visitors over the decades. This ballpark even experienced an actual live-birth of a new team, the Gulf Coast League Devil Rays, the necessary precursor to today's American League Rays, that first took the field in 1996 on this site.

So, it has the pedigree and it has the views of downtown and the Bay, but does it have the space for something this size? The drawings presented to the public showed that, with minimal disruption to the original footprint, the dream stadium of the Rays would fit. Yes, it would require a 600+/- square foot section of the Bay to be filled in near the dogleg on Bayshore Dr SE, but it would guarantee St. Pete would be the home of Major League Baseball in Tampa Bay for a very long time. With ample parking downtown, connection to Interstate 275 via two connecting freeways, and access to the existing bus hub in downtown - with space available in the parking lots of the St. Petersburg Times for an intermodal transit hub when rail gets going in a decade or so - what could possibly be the downside to this?

Enter 1 Beach Drive, St. Petersburg, FL, 33701 aka the Bayfront Tower.

What seemed like a surefire way for the city to get the 80 acres the Trop sits on back onto the tax roles and a permanent home to the area's "boys of summer" quickly turned awry. Betting against old, rich, blue hairs with nothing to do and all the time in the world to do it is a mistake. After a year of debates, protests, campaigns for and against the proposal, and being a hot-button issue in the mayoral race, the Rays officially tabled the idea indefinitely. What seemed like the right thing for a city on the rise was now just a smoldering pile of ash. The dream stadium would stay just that: an eternal dream that would never come about.

Fast forward to June 2010, where the Rays - which had been dodging the question since their first proposal died, who insisted they're not demanding anything but "we will not be playing in Tropicana Field in 2027" - all of a sudden demanded something: a new home, and soon. But it came with a caveat: no more talk of downtown St. Pete, and probably no more talk of St. Pete as a whole. The place where the impossible dream started will no longer the be the home of the next dream. Just like a jilted lover left on his knee after his girlfriend said, "No," the Rays are doing what they can to cut ties with St. Pete, including possibly spiting them by leaving the county entirely. What once seemed like a sure thing less than 24 months prior turned into, for lack of a better word, a clusterfuck.

So, Stu has done everything right to this point: he made his case, brought forth a proposal, accepted the first defeat gracefully, plotted his next move, and pulled the trigger. Hell, it could even be argued that his refusal to accept the first (of many to come, I'm sure) compromise by the City since this all started was smart. As a good friend of mine pointed out, "It doesn't matter to me where they go as long as it's not out of state or too far out of the TB area." And despite my rage for the cavalier attitude in Stu's blatant shunning of St. Pete, he's right: we do need to do whatever it takes to keep them, as they are our team, and to let the Rays go to Portland or Charlotte because of our petty parochialism would be a PR disaster of epic proportions for the region as a whole. No one would ever want to move to such a "spiteful, ungrateful, and shameless" area; we've already gotten a black eye for - no matter if it's justified or not - our treatment of the homeless population, so we shouldn't give the national media any other reason to turn potential new residents away.

That all said, St. Pete shouldn't be sold out, either, to make the "spirit of cooperation" work. As I've said previously, we stand to lose the most should they leave our city, as we we've been the ones putting out the money to make the team viable in the area. As evidenced by their television ratings, they are definitely a team with a loyal and deep fan base, despite the accusations by know-nothings from other regions, so it's not a case of overall apathy. In fact, I think they could do just as well, or maybe even marginally better, over in downtown Tampa, though not as good as people are alluding. (Let's face it: until mass transit is up and running, people just don't like the hassle of driving and parking along with 17,000 others.)

Without some kind of guarantees in a new contract, however, St. Pete loses something more than status as a "major league city" by forfeiting the Rays to Tampa or anywhere else: they lose the revenue brought in, and in the end, that's all that should matter to the City. There's a guaranteed 81 days a year - in the middle of a summer season that's brutal for natives, let alone visitors - where people will be downtown. People are spending more time downtown since parking is harder and harder to get at the Trop, and they make more impulse purchases based on what they see when they walk by, which is what fuels areas around the county like Wrigleyville, the Inner Harbor, and the Gas Lamp Quarter.

Losing that guaranteed draw will cause irreparable harm to the overall economy of the city; the Suncoast Dome was built to get the city out of that same economic disaster in the first place. So, that's the main reason Foster needs to try and keep them in St. Pete first, but if they can't (and without a proposal by the City the team can't refuse) they need to focus on protecting our interests. Require any negotiations with other cities include a guaranteed percentage of the revenue coming to St. Pete. In return, we invest that same percentage rate into the final cost of the new stadium. We force the first cooperative effort by any of our cities since the bridges were built, which in turn could lead to more cross-Bay relationships, including mass transit, and finally bring us on-par with other metros across the country. Doing so guarantees St. Pete much-needed revenue for as long as the stadium stands, the Rays get their dream stadium in any city they want, and the new home of the Rays is still within 60 minutes of the loyal fan base it has painstakingly created over the past 13 years.

I'll be the first to admit it: I'm spoiled. I have baseball in my backyard and don't have to sacrifice much to be there; sadly, not everyone's that lucky. However, this is a very spread-out area, so getting a stadium near the vast majority of the population - like it is in cities like Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Los Angeles - is near impossible. To make it all work, we all need to sacrifice something we cherish. For me, it's the stubbornness of letting them leave my grasp and following them wherever they end up. For St. Pete, it's the civic pride and bragging rights they bring. For people more than 15 miles from the stadium, it's the idea that "if it's not 5 minutes away, it's too far," and tossing that out the window.

We cannot, however, sacrifice everything for something, and when being put in an unreasonable position of "bad guy" solely for the "greater good" without any chance to ask for anything in return is unacceptable. If you'd like to be a good negotiator, Stu, next time St. Pete comes to the table with a proposal, understand the City will inevitably lose massive amounts of cash based on your move and offer them a bone in return for their cooperation. You'd be surprised how far you can go with a little empathy.

What Would Jimbo Do? (An Occassional Feature)

Greetings and salutations, my virtual friends. I'm not feeling myself today, so instead of taking meds or getting sleep like I feel like I probably should, I'm instead going to eat Spinach Alfredo pizza with chicken and bacon, forgo all modesty and write this half-naked, and pretend you give a damn about my ideas, because - as you know - I rock! The way this occasional works is simple: I pick one thing going on in the world, no matter how large, controversial, or trivial, and tell you what I, as King of Everything Existing, Gone, and Yet-to-Be-Created, would do. I promise not to go over three paragraphs for the idea, and you're welcome to pelt me with comments/suggestions/questions - or, if you prefer, snowballs. So, without further ado, let the fun begin!

Today's subject: Making an east-west freeway in Pinellas County - Change, no matter how hard people try to fight it, is good for everyone. Things need to change and adapt to survive, and whole people will try and resist, you need to figure out when the change is beneficial and ignore the naysayers or when the vocal opposition is correct. Here's what I think will help St. Pete, and the rest of southern Pinellas County, become much more conveniently attractive to out-of-towners as it deserves to be without demolishing everything in its path:

Build a 4th east-west Tampa Bay high-level crossing, utilizing I-175 via tunnel from right before 4th St S to a man-made island just east of Albert Whitted Airport, that can accommodate commuter rail. With respect to the high water-table, the tunnel can be built the same way as the New River Tunnel is built in Fort Lauderdale so water can't seep in. Charge a toll so the Sunshine Skyway Bridge doesn't suffer from "shunpiking", but something reasonable to make it attractive ($2 eastbound only), and have it connect to I-75 near Apollo Beach. Remove the exit at 6th St, use that space to build a westbound exit to 8th St, and have exits to 4th St (EB) and 3rd St (WB) (a la Boston's Big Dig) to the west of the bridge.

Extend I-175 westward toward the beaches along the 5th St S corridor. Instead of uprooting people's lives, however, use the Big Dig as an example again and bury the freeway under the city. Exits to access this freeway would be available at 22nd St S, 34th St S, and 49th St S, before it turns northwest toward it's final destination. In the meantime, the 1st Ave N/S twins would have access, as well as 5th Ave N. The freeway would reemerge on Tyrone Blvd, which would be turned into a freeway from 9th Ave N all the way to the current freeway-style interchange to Madeira Beach; exits would be provided at today's major intersections: 22nd Ave N/66th St N, 38th Ave N, Park St N, and the Bay Pines VA. Access to others addresses would be provided by frontage roads. The light on the Tom Stuart Causeway would also be removed, as well as raising the drawbridge to eliminate most openings.

There, problem solved. See? That wasn't insanely painful, was it? Again, this is only occasional (read: when I get a bug up my ass), so I can't tell you when or what the next one will be. All I can do is invite you to leave a comment. So, get down on it!

Phickle Phoridians and What They Say About Us

So, I’ve had a terrible case of “writer’s block”, which is why I haven’t posted on this blog since my observation on the Supreme Court of Public Opinion case #2009-0618, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, musca domestica, et. al. vs. Barack H. Obama, President of the United States. Sometimes, however, life has a funny way of dropping something so pertinent to you right on your lap you’d be insane not to approach it. Thus, let me finish this paragraph by stating this: Kevin, I know you and I strongly recommend you look away from the rest of this blog now – you know what’s coming.

Tropicana Field: loathe it or love it, it is the home of the Tampa Bay Rays; has hosted, among others in its 19-year history, the following large-scale events: the largest one-night indoor concert in Florida, NCAA Men’s Final Four, the Davis Cup, the NHL Playoffs, ArenaBowl IX, and – oh yeah – the World Series; and, contrary to popular opinion, is centrally located near the population center of the Bay Area. So, why is it people can pack the Trop when it’s a “gala event” (like the playoffs, the World Series, or the raising of the banners), but when – God-forbid – you need to actually watch the game and not just sit in a seat and take pictures to say, “Look where I was!” the sea of blue you see on TV is not people, but empty seats? What possesses the people of Florida – not just Tampa Bay, as the same phenomenon is occurring in both Miami and Jacksonville – to be apathetic toward something so community-driven that other cities would kill to have?

Let’s first take a look at some of the excuses and see if they can’t be debunked. The biggest excuse that people – mainly from Tampa and to the northeast – have is the time and distance. As a St. Pete resident of 6 years, I can safely say that argument is a load of crap. The worst direction to travel during either rush hour is toward Tampa. The bridges feed into Tampa’s overworked, outdated road system that can’t handle normal everyday traffic. Add the 5-10,000 extra vehicles that will appear on the Howard Frankland, Gandy, or Courtney Campbell bridges during that rush – in which most games are played, and no one would make it leaving at 5:30pm from Pinellas to the stadium, irregardless of the placement in the city, by opening pitch without pushing start times past 7:30pm; it will be near impossible to have Bob DuPry’s office to sign off on that. So, until TBARTA gets going, no place in the area will be convenient enough for everyone.

Speaking of TBARTA, the next issue is its location in general. Having been built in downtown St. Pete, which most consider “isolated” from the area since it’s on a peninsula, makes it that much more impossible to break that impervious across Tampa Bay known as the Hillsborough/Pinellas county line. However, a new study the ABC Coalition published today in the St. Petersburg Times shows 5 different locations and the population within 30 miles of each. Downtown St. Pete has the least, but at 2,245,129, it is within 100,000 of the “top spot”, Downtown Tampa. Also, with TBARTA planning to build a transportation hub right near the Trop location that will make it easily accessible by rail from Clearwater, Tampa, Brandon, Plant City, Wesley Chapel, and possibly New Port Richey, and express busses from northern Pinellas, Bradenton, Sarasota, Brooksville, Crystal River, Lakeland, and all points in between, Downtown St. Pete just became that much more attractive. Granted, it’ll take 5 years – if started today – for the first signs of TBARTA’s impact, but seeing as it takes 3-4 years to build a stadium when you don’t have a billion dollars to throw around like the Yankees and Mets, you need to consider those transportation nodes in the final decision of stadium location.

While we’re talking bottomless bank rolls, let’s talk another favorite topic: dollars and “sense”. Everyone said the original deal to put it on the waterfront for $450 million was “too expensive.” However, those same people arguing it will cost too much also want a $471 million rehab of Tropicana Field. To that I quote Carlos Mencia: “DEE-Dee-dee!!!” Thanks for “protecting our wallets” on that one, POWW. So, according to citizens of Tampa, it either needs to be in Tampa, since it’s the “population center” (which it’s geographically not; including Bradenton and Sarasota, that distinction belongs about 83rd Ave N and 4th St N in St. Pete), or at the very north end of St. Pete so people from Tampa “don’t need to drive as far.” However, there’s no city- or county-owned land up in the Gateway area, as that area of St. Pete is known, that doesn’t require mitigation; same goes with Tampa. So, if Tampa or Gateway are the “prime spots,” why would we up the price of the stadium by up to $150 million in land acquisition and/or landfill mitigation costs just to kowtow to the demands of an extra 100,000? I don’t know about you, but an investment of up to $1.5 million per person for people who may never go to a game seems like wasted money.

Another issue is the play on the field. “Why should I support a team that is barely over .500?” I’ll give you one major reason why: we went to the World Series last year. How’s that for a “what have you done for me lately” retort? They have a winning record! They’re playing surprisingly well in spite of major injuries that took out, for some length of time, the following people (in no particular order): Chad Bradford, Scott Kazmir, Troy Percival, Jason Isringhausen, Jason Bartlett, Aki Iwamura, Evan Longoria, and Pat Burrell (I’m sure I forgot some along the way, too). That’s almost a whole freakin’ team on the DL! Yet they’re three games over .500 – something that would have seemed like a Godsend 2 years ago – and are still within reach of the AL East crown. Granted, in every other division, 38-35 would be good enough for at least 3rd (2nd in the AL Central and NL East), but this isn’t every other division, and I think that’s why the fans are very fickle. However, it’s not excuse. Here’s a list of teams with worse records than us (as of Wednesday) that have better attendance averages (in order of attendance, records and place in division in parentheses): Cubs (34-34, 3rd), Mets (36-34, 2nd), Astros (32-37, 5th), Rockies (37-35, 3rd), Mariners (36-35, 3rd), Twins (36-37, 2nd), D-Backs (30-42, 5th), Braves (34-37, 4th), White Sox (34-37, 3rd), Padres (31-39, 4th), Reds (34-36, 3rd), and Royals (31-39, 4th). In fact, we are one of only two teams that have winning records that are in the bottom 20 – the other being the Marlins (37-36, 3rd) at 29th. See? It’s not just Tampa Bay with the attendance issues.

And that brings me to the bigger issue: are we, as Phloridians (again, my blog, my spelling rules), apathetic to sports in general? The only team that has had no attendance issues anywhere in Phlorida was the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but that’s about to change with the loss of most of the season ticket holders due to the economy. So what is the root cause of it? What would create such an indifference to teams and franchises that areas like San Antonio, Portland, Hampton Roads, and especially Las Vegas are pushing hard to secure? Do we just, like the sun, sand, and surf, take them for granted that they’ll always be here? Or is it more of an inherent issue? I can honestly see the problem with hockey as a whole in the Sunshine State, as there is no history or pedigree throughout history here (one Stanley Cup doesn’t erase 70 years of isolation from the sport). However, football should be huge here, and it is: at the college level. The pro teams are struggling to fill seats; the Jags are on the verge of moving to Toronto (!) if revenue doesn’t pick back up, and with no naming rights to Jacksonville Municipal Stadium, I don’t foresee that happening in the near-term. The Dolphins are struggling in a tough division and can’t get enough people in the seats to expand the payroll and get better players. The Bucs’ waiting list evaporated almost overnight, and now they’re soliciting me to get a ticket package (just because I’m a Rays’ holder doesn’t mean I would support the team that embarrassed the Eagles in Philly twice in one year’s time). Baseball also has a long, storied history here, but mainly through Spring Training. But the excitement of March seems to quickly wear off as the attention spans of the natives get bored and move to the next big thing.

From this writer’s perspective, it seems like the main issue is Phlorida’s ingrained obsession with vanity. They do what they can, however they can, to be noticed. Look at South Beach as a prime example. In and of itself, it’s nothing more than a very nice beach town found at any oceanfront state (the Hamptons in New York, Avalon in New Jersey, Nags Head in North Carolina, Myrtle Beach in South Carolina, amongst many others). However, the rich and famous hang out there, songs like “Miami” by Will Smith celebrate it, and TV shows like “Burn Notice” make it a living, breathing character along side the cast. That’s why people feel the need to go to South Beach; not because the sand is made of gold or it houses the Fountain of Youth, but because they can be seen. Clearwater Beach has just as nice – if not better – beaches, and there’s just as much money in those condos as the condos on the other side of the state, but it’s not as glorified. Why? Because no one will see you there except for that tourist from Montreal. That’s why the Rays can sell out the playoffs, but can’t get rid of tickets for a World Series rematch. That’s why the Lightning set attendance records at the Thunderdome (now known as Tropicana Field) during the playoffs, but can’t get more than 7,000 people to attend an average game at the Forum (neé Ice Palace). That’s why the Jaguars haven’t sold out a game in almost a year, and the Magic, on their historic playoff run, couldn’t get a full house until the Finals. Unless people will notice you, Phloridians just can’t waste their time with trivialities like sports. But then, this argument doesn’t hold much water when, in California, the geographical center of vanity, the Dodgers and Lakers sell out games constantly, does it?

So, what is it? Why are sports as a whole, not just the Rays and their red-headed adopted son known as the Trop, neglected in this state? Why can a meaningless Spring Training series between the Rays and the Phillies in Philadelphia sell out (about 90K people over two games), but the same series in St. Pete with both teams fighting for position in their respective division can’t draw more than 60K people for three? What makes people spend more time in a bikini or swim trunks getting the early stages of melanoma instead of spending money on organizations that provide money and supplies to both youth and adult non-profit organizations alike? Why do we, as a state, demand new facilities and/or locations for these teams, only to shun them the same way we did before with the same tired excuses, just amended to fit the new situation?

As someone who loves sports, I can’t understand it. All I can understand is no matter where the Rays new stadium is built, be it Tampa, Downtown St. Pete, or an island in the middle of Tampa Bay with off ramps right off the Howard Frankland and hydrofoils from locations every 2 miles along the bay’s shoreline for those who don’t want to drive, some group will complain about the distance, the money, the team’s performance; you know, the same excuses that have been used for years. And that’s just how Phlorida is; nothing changes, no matter how many people you try to cater to.

Low-Speed Hijinx

Greetings and salutations, everyone! Enjoy the Rays complete and utter domination over De La Rosa last night? Well, here's a little surprise for you out there who thought you'd never see this: Pat Burrell will (most likely) start in right tonight! Going 11-16 against tonight's starter for the Rockies, Aaron Cook, will kinda make you all that more valuable. Considering he's fresh from rehab and sporting the new porn-star goatee (which I will get a pic of...promise!), it hopefully will be a sign of things to come. David Price is on the mound tonight, hoping to rebound from a win that was more ugly than some losses I've seen (while only getting a 2.37 ERA, he threw 105 pitches in only 4 1/3 innings and giving up 6 walks, though he did have 6 Ks, too). He, like Pat the Bat, will come around in time, I'm sure.

So, did you hear? SEPTA, our friendly neighborhood mass transit system up in Philly (more like the TBARTA will be than PSTA is) looks like it was the butt of a joke recently, and they seem none too thrilled. According to today's Inquirer, sometime overnight the pranksters placed a sign - of high-quality and pretty authentic-looking, I might say - with the following text on many of SEPTA's main routes:


Courtesy: DesignPhiladelphia

"The Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority (SEPTA) is committed to providing non-discriminatory transportation services to all of its passengers, including schizophrenics, drug addicts, Irish Catholics, hipsters, homos, prostitutes, gentrifying transplants, raging maniacs, tourists, obnoxious Penn students, corner boys, pimps, drunk rich kids who still think Old City is cool, and terrified suburbanites who tremble with unease at the sight of everyone.

"Any person who is or seeks to be a patron of any SEPTA public vehicle shall be entitled to the same depressing experience of loud cell phones, obese people eating McDonalds, parents telling their toddlers to "Shut the Fuck Up!", and a constant inch-deep layer of urine-soaked trash and debris.

"No person or group of persons shall be discriminated against on any grounds with regard to routing, scheduling, or quality of transportation service furnished by SEPTA, with the following exceptions - race, color, socioeconomic status, and proximity to the suburbs.

"Any person who has experienced a cleaner, more efficient, more extensive, and better managed public transportation system in the U.S. (e.g. most if not all) can feel free to notify SEPTA about potential improvements, which shall promptly be ignored."

Apparently, these jokers have been practicing for a while, because they were able to get these pretty large signs up and under the protective glass where the advertisements usually peer upon said groups. Keep in mind I'm not easily offended, but from a practical joke standpoint, that was pretty damn funny! I can see why SEPTA would be offended, but let's face it; if they'd clean up the problems they're being lampooned over in the first place, this wouldn't be nearly as comical. But anyone who's ridden the El knows what I'm talking about: it's funny because it's true!

I'm not saying it's a bad thing, mind you, because those groups listed make it a diverse and interesting ride. In fact, I can't wait until TBARTA (God, I hope they change the name; that's a mouthful!) gets going and I can experience the atmosphere it will showcase. You really can't experience a region's true identity until you've taken a trip on its mass transit system, and seeing as we have really nothing here in Tampa Bay - except for sketchy, local bus-only companies like PSTA, HART, PCPT - tourists not only don't get the full extent of our rich culture and heritage, but they also get nowhere fast without renting a car.

(Side note and shameless plug for a fellow blogger: to get the full extent of what a mass transit system means to a region, check out the great piece my man Brad Maule over at PhillySkyline.com did on SEPTA and the Independence Pass. It gives you an idea of what I mean about mass transit showcasing the culture - both really good and brutally honest - of an area. Great work on that, Brad and the rest of the gang over there!)

So, do I think the "rapscallions" who did this deserve to be punished? If only for vandalism - since it is private property - and not anything regarding their "potentially offensive" language. Are they right about it? In a broad aspect, yes, but not to the level they took it. Is it hysterical? Abso-freakin-lutely! If I ever saw them on a train down here doing that, I wouldn't help them, but you're damn right I'd cheer them on! Everyone needs a good laugh once in a while, even at the expense of your self-dignity. Nothing's funnier than pointing out your own flaws, trust me.

Alright, kids. Two games tonight at the same bat times as last night, but different bat channel for the Phils - only outside the Delaware Valley and Greater Toronto, however - who play the Blue Jays (which, besides being a Phils phan, needs them to win so the Rays can take sole possession of 3rd) at 7:05 on ESPN (CSN in Philly, SNET in Toronto). The Rays play the Rockies again @ 8:40 EDT on Sun Sports in Tampa Bay/FSN in Denver. Speaking of the Mile-High City, if youre in the area, don't forget to get your free meal from Johnny's New York Pizza and Pasta Store in Lakewood; just wear your Rays blue & gold today only to get dinner on the house. Talk of food's making me hungry...you think they deliver to St. Pete?

- Big thanks goes out to Kevin Derrick over at DesignPhiladelphia for the SEPTA sign pic!