Why I'm a Diehard Rays Fan (and Closet Lightning Fan) - My Manifesto

For the first 10 years of their life, the "Devil Rays" (as they were once infamously known) were the laughingstock of baseball, and arguably all of the sports world. They had Wade Boggs and what is considered his greatest moment, his 3,000th hit, though he would have had that anywhere; it was just happenstance he was wearing black, purple, and green and playing in a perpetually-maligned dome. They had the "Hit Show" - Jose Conseco, Fred McGriff, Vinny Castilla, and Greg Vaughn - which, needless to say, didn't live up to their hype. They never had an out-of-last-place season - let alone a winning season - save for one season, 2004, when they finished 4th in the AL East. They had homegrown stars - Josh Hamilton, Joe Kennedy, Aubrey Huff, Randy Winn - that went on to have much better careers after leaving their first home. They had an owner who not only refused to open his wallet, but also refused to allow cheering, screaming, and any type of loud noises anywhere in "his" stadium; anyone caught breaking this "rule" would be asked politely to quiet down, then on the next attempt to hush the "rabble-rouser" they would be evicted.

Yet, with all that documented extensively, I made a seemingly irrational decision one day in September 2007: I became a shareholder in the team of endless misery. Apparently, I am - myself - a glutton for punishment. After I signed the paperwork and handed over the check, the first thing I said to myself: "What the hell did I just do...?"

I grew up in Pedricktown, New Jersey. I'm sure - unless you live in Salem or Gloucester counties - you've never heard of it. It is, however, the most-rural suburb of Philadelphia, and as a member of the Delaware Valley, your sports allegiances are already dictated to you in the delivery room: Sixers, Flyers, Eagles, and Phillies are your only choices, so choose wisely or face the possibility of adoption. You're forgiven if you choose not to like any of the aforementioned teams, so long as you don't like any other team in their respective sports league. Some people believe in a bastardized version of the Amish's Rumspringa, where when you are old enough to think for yourself (usually anywhere between 9-13 years old), you can choose a different team in any and/or all sports. However, once you choose, you are bound to follow them ad infinitum. This explains how, in an area that is very staunchly against any team in any sport's division rivals, you will find some "brave" Cowboys, Devils, Braves, and Knicks fans.

I stayed true and exclusive to my "birth-rite" teams (though I never really followed the NBA to any great extent, so my indifference toward the Sixers is forgiven by most) until about 2006 - 3 years after I moved to St. Pete. Up until that time, I refused to set foot in the "Dumb Dome" and my baseball fix was obtained in the short month of March on the open, grassy surface of Bright House Field in Clearwater or the occasional Phillies game on Fox and Sun Sports (when they played the Marlins).

I got my hockey fix going to the two games per year the Flyers played at the St. Pete Times Forum and would only go to other games if I got free tickets from work, convinced friends (like Kevin and "Rabid Nick") I knew would like them to come with me, and I'd get to cheer against the Bolts (be it the Maple Leafs or the Mighty Ducks); the only exception to the "cheer against the Bolts" was when they played the Atlantic Division teams...for obviously-selfish reasons.

My football fix would come with going to the local Eagles bar, The Bull Horn on USF's campus, every week with my friend from work, Immani, that I found, too, likes the Birds. Even if it was "all-the-way" in Tampa, I was there for almost every game - unless it was shown on local Fox, CBS, or ABC TV so I could watch with my mom. You could always catch me there with my Irving Fryar, then David Akers Super Bowl, jersey, chanting "Fly, Eagles, Fly!" with the rest of them.

Never in a million years would I root against any of them, as they were my teams, my link to the snow-covered region I left back on that cold day of March 16, 2003.

Then I visited Al Lang Field.

In 2007, my then-roommate Becky suggested, instead of going to Clearwater in March, I should check-out the ballpark by the Bay in Downtown St. Pete. I just started my new job down the street the May prior, so I could park at work and walk over, making it even more convenient. Sure it may not be as new and shiny as Bright House Field, but Progress Energy Park (as Al Lang Field is now called) had the old Florida charm all the other spring training stadiums combined couldn't even muster, she said.

So, I took her up on her suggestion. We went to the first meeting of the Devil Rays and the Phillies that year at Al Lang, and what I was saw on the field impressed me and gave me hope for the future of the team. I knew this team wasn't far off from finally, after years of mediocrity, being a contender. I was watching history in the making, and I loved everything I saw.

And I wasn't talking about the Phillies.

The Devil Rays played a style of baseball I hadn't seen on Broad Street since I was young. They had guys like Carl Crawford and Delmon Young that were aggressive on the bases, they had guys like Carlos Peña and Akinori Iwamura that could hit the side of the Mahaffey Theater in Al Lang's outfield if they tried, and they had starting pitching out of Scott Kazmir and James Shields that made opposing batters cringe. Their bullpen, with people like Chad Orvella and Jae Kuk Ryu however, was anemic - to put it mildly - and made high-quality pitchers like Grant Balfour and J.P. Howell look just as bad. Once that was fixed, I knew they were going to be not just good, but very good. They showed up the Phillies that day, and as we walked back to my work parking lot, I told Becky, "Sure, I'll go to more games down here with you."

With the highly-publicized entrance of a new manager and ownership (the "Under Construction" campaign was extremely visible the entire 2005 season), they turned Tropicana Field from the "Dumb Dome" to "The Trop". Gone was the empty space on the walls that made it feel like the inside of an oil container or warehouse, and the redesign made it feel more like what a baseball field should feel like: large, easy-to-see stats boards and scoreboards, advertisements that felt more like those at Yankee Stadium, and what was once the largest-HDTV in baseball. On- and off-the-field, it felt like baseball finally arrived at the Trop...9 years late.

Despite Peña setting the team record for most HRs in a season (as well as leading the AL) and winning the AL's Comeback Player of the Year Award, Kazmir having the most strikeouts in the AL (and most in 162 games for all of baseball; Jake Peavy needed 163 days to beat him when San Diego played Arizona in a tie-breaker game), and Delmon Young being 2nd in voting for AL Rookie of the Year, the team still finished poorly: 66-96, worst in the majors, thanks in large part to the bullpen's over 6.00 ERA, worst in the majors in over 50 years. But the stage was set for greatness, and after going to over 20 regular season games through the course of the season - even when they took their tailspin in late June into August - I decided to invest in their future.

I became a season-ticket holder of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

"Sure hope you know what you're doing...." my conscience and checkbook both said. I'm sure glad I did, though, for - as everyone knows by now - the newly-christened "Tampa Bay Rays" kept winning and kept winning, making the playoffs for the first time in their history (not to mention it was their first-ever winning season), then continued to surprise as they went to the World Series in 2008 against (holy shit!) my Phillies. For the record, I wore my Devil Rays jersey - I got it on super-clearance at the end of the 2007 season for $50 (normally $200) - with my Rays hat only because my friend, Brad, was in town from Philly, so I had to balance out his Philly love. However, for Game 2, I wore my Phillies shirt with Rays hat. I didn't care whom won, as my "impossible dream" scenario came true.

I'm still a season-ticket holder of the Rays to this day. Even as the prices kept going up - and my pay at work went down - I cut corners to make it work, as I'm not about to give up my tickets; I love my Rays too much. I still love my Phillies and always will, but let's be honest: what do the Phillies do for my community? They don't help with youth sports funding in Tampa. They don't visit schools in New Port Richey to help add to the reading programs. They don't contribute $100 million to the economy of St. Petersburg every year. The closest they come to me in normal years during the season is Miami.

The Rays do all that, and more, for my new home. In that area, they are even greater than the 2008 World Series champions, and it took me a trip to Al Lang Field to finally admit that to myself.

The Lightning, on a smaller scale, contribute in the same aspects, but I don't carry a torch for them nearly as much as I do for the Rays; I don't however, boo them when I go anymore, and only cheer against them when Philly's in town. I can safely say I'm still a Flyers fan first, but I enjoy getting my hockey fix at the Forum on days that the "Orange Crush" doesn't take over the stands. So, in that aspect, I guess it makes me a Lightning fan, but don't expect me to choose between the two: it's not a choice - Broad Street Bullies all-the-way!

I can't say the same if I had to choose between the Rays and Phillies, nor should I have to. They never play each other except in spring training, occasional interleague games, and the World Series. They have (for the most-part, if I'm any indication) completely separate fan bases that work differently, but are just as passionate as each other. But most importantly, they hold different places in my heart: the Phillies represent my past and all the great things I miss about it, while the Rays represent my present and all the even greater things and people I know now (and good friends I go to games with on a regular basis, like "McLovin" and James). So, that being said, I guess I'd have to say if I had to choose, sorry Uncle Cholly, but Merlot Joe and his team of superheroes are my number ones.

Sure, they may play in a nationally-loathed but locally-loved dome with catwalks people refuse to understand in front of crowds deemed "unacceptable" by suits in a faraway city that has a fan base with a 40+ year headstart to grow to today's sizes with a media that laments their eventual removal from the area, but the people who preach to me and other converted fans that those aspects should be cause enough not to even like them just don't get it. You can't have it both ways: "you can't forsake your birth-rite" but "they don't deserve a team since they can't support them." For a team that's oldest "birth-rite" fan is only 13 years old today, it's impossible to sustain a team with only kids under 13 in the stands. So, I'm doing my part and supporting my team, and damn anyone who tries to pull that "birth-rite" crap on me. Face it, reality dictates you cannot have it both ways, so the sooner you realize that, the sooner I can possibly convert you too, if only for a day. As with me, a day is possibly all you need to change your thinking forever.

I still have never been to Raymond James Stadium and have no intention of going anytime soon, in case you're wondering.

Extolling Our Independence

So, yesterday was our Independence Day. It's a day when we celebrate becoming the first long-lasting democracy in the world since the Roman Republic was dissolved in favor of making Gaius Julius Caesar dictator perpetuo. Sure, there were other attempts at a government "by the people, for the people," or societies that had some qualities of democracy between 41 BC and 1776 AD, but none of them gave such broad freedoms* to every citizen† as the founding fathers eventually did. But contrary to popular opinion, the Declaration of Independence didn't give us our freedoms; it was more of a complaint-laden diatribe against His Highness, the mentally unstable George III of the UK, and why we needed to kick his government to the curb. The Constitution codified those "truths" we held "to be self-evident;" the Declaration was just the jumping point to plant the seeds of freedom.
(*-the right to vote limited to only White men 21+ years old until 1865 for all races, until 1920 for women, and until 1971 for 18+ year olds;
†-3/5 of a citizen if you were Black or Indian before 1865)

Obviously, freedom didn't come easy, nor was it free from speed bumps. It took a long time to get the hang of this "American experiment" known as a federal democracy. The original idea - and the core argument behind the Civil War - was each State had precedent over the central government; this philosophy was endorsed in the Articles of Confederation. Needless to say, that failed, as we have the Constitution today. Then, the southern states tried to persuade Washington that was still the original intent of the rewritten Constitution and its 10th Amendment:

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

South Carolina decided that meant if it's not covered in the Constitution explicitly it was up the States to decide (i.e., slaves and secession). Well, that really didn't turn out how Columbia thought it would when Abraham Lincoln called their bluff, did it? It took four years and over 600,000 lives, but the power of the Union - and of the Constitution - remained in tact. Also, an interesting caveat came of it; the formation of a new state from an existing one. West Virginia remains, to this day, the only state formed because of a war.

Maine and Kentucky, however, were carved out of existing states without bloodshed. Kentucky asked the Virginia Assembly and the US House for permission to form its own government and control its own destiny, and permission was given; Maine came about due to the Missouri Compromise so the "Slave States" and "Free States" had the same power in the Senate, but more-or-less, it was the same premise - state wanted self-determination and luck had it they were more needed than they thought. So, it has been done in US history; it's not an unprecedented events by any means, though it is hard to do for sure.

So, in that same spirit, why is it every time either South Jersey or South Florida talk of secession from their states, they are laughed off - by the governor himself, no less? These are people who are seriously expressing their displeasure with their governments and - in the case of South Jersey - how they are represented in the Assembly. Culturally and economically, they are a world away from their counterparts in the north and it's time for them to be allowed to govern themselves.

South Jersey constitutes the counties of (from north to south) Camden, Gloucester, Atlantic, Salem, Cumberland, and Cape May. (Side note: I would be tempted to include Burlington and Ocean counties, as well, but a friend of mine from Ocean County considers himself to be from "Central Jersey", and using that logic, the people from Ocean and Burlington would be less likely to vote for such a proposal.) South Jersey could make its temporary capital in Glassboro (since it has the foreign policy experience and the state university, as well as plenty of access to the rest of the new state with Route 55 and US 322), with a possible move in the future to a more-centrally located built-from-the-ground-up city in either Salem or Cumberland counties.

South Florida, though different from some proposals, would be from the following counties southward: Citrus, Sumter, Lake, Seminole, Orange, and Brevard. The capital pro tempore would need to be either Port Charlotte or Vero Beach, as not to give any one city a political advantage over another (which is why Tallahassee was chosen, even though it is over 600 driving miles from its furthest in-state city, Key West). At some point, a new capital would need to be built more centrally - like near Lake Placid - but only when infrastructure could support it.

Now is the time to rise up and push these movements to fruition. The French didn't let the monarchy run them forever, the Mexicans didn't stay under Spanish rule, and the Indians threw the British out of their land. On this Independence Weekend 2009, let's exhibit the most basic of fundamental human rights, it's the first one they thought of when amending the Constitution: the freedom to protest peacefully. Remember, as Thomas Jefferson once said, "When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." Let's help the government remember that - non-violently, of course; I'll never condone that - in a democracy, we're in control. We want our own states and will do what we can to get them! Enough of being North Jersey's bitch and North Florida's bankroll! It's our time - it's our turn!

OK, if you read through my political rhetoric that long, you deserve a reward. Happy Independence Day everyone!

Insane in the Membrane

President Barack Hussein Obama is a murderer! The man who ran on a campaign of "peace" and "change" took an innocent life - on film, no less! - and laughed as the carcass of his fallen enemy lain there on the carpet. No trial, no jury, no judge. He was the law at that moment, and because this harmless being simply "got on his nerves", he slew the helpless fool in cold blood. He could have at least imprisoned and then set him free, but no; Obama said, "Damn the Constitution!" and took its life. This man is deplorable and should be executed.

That's what our resident whack-jobs over at PETA what you to think, anyway. Why now, you ask? Oh? Did you not see the footage? Well, let me show you:



That's right, ladies and gentlemen; your president, the one (don't debate me on this statement, I don't wanna hear it on this post!) doing his best to clean up the mess both George W. Bush and Bill Clinton put us in is being accused, not of the typical, "left-wing liberal commie" crap, but killing an "innocent" fly by your friends at the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. My, oh my, talk about an organization that has lost its meaning.

PETA was started in 1980 as an organization dedicated to make sure four key things were monitored: 1.) Hollywood didn't mistreat animals, 2.) the fur trade was stopped, 3.) animal testing was either humanely done or stopped altogether, and 4.) farm animals were kept out of deplorable conditions. However, since the beginning, their methodology on safeguarding their core values has always been controversial. Throwing paint on fur coats, harassing lab workers in the streets, and suing movie lots are just some of the stunts this group has performed.

Once they realized this garnered them attention (like they say, bad publicity is better than none at all), they started to expand into the realm of the absurd, like suggesting fishing is the same as sticking a hook in your dog's eye, or eating beef is equivalent to dining on a monkey. They have even chastised sports athletes such as Shane Victorino for eating Spam, a much-maligned (yet pretty decent if cooked right) food considered a staple in his native Hawaii. But now, I can truly say I've seen it all.

They are sending President Obama a "humane fly trap" so he can catch the annoying pest that is known to carry diseases such as typhoid, cholera, and dysentery, and release it back into the wild. They said he should not "glorify" the killing of any creature and, as a role-model, should "know better."

(Before I continue, I want to point out I'm not at all against "animal rights" - thought I don't like that term. I love dogs and cats, and nothing should ever happen to them, such as beatings, over breeding, and even neglect; it breaks my heart to see that. However, there are some animals humans have used as food for 10,000 years, and until the last 150, did it humanely. I agree that furs from chinchillas shouldn't be harvested simply for a coat; the whole chinchilla should be used, either as dog food or helping to feed the homeless. Same thing goes for seal pelts and any other creatures that are useful to everyone. Over-harvesting is bad, too, and that should be monitored, or some animals will go the way of the dodo. But don't bitch at me for eating venison or call me a "murderer" because I have an ivory chess set. So long as it's done in an ecologically-sane and humane manner, we're the top of the food chain and we have every right to act that way.)

So, here's a solution I think most people can agree with: because there is a major over-population issue with this planet (6.4 billion and growing) and we're trying to rid ourselves of the idiots roaming around, why not round up every card-carrying member of PETA and anyone who believes their BS, put them all on some secluded island out in the Atlantic that no one lives at now, and drop a nuke on them. Solves three issues: 1.) reduces the population, 2.) gets rid of whack jobs, and 3.) shows countries like North Korea and Iran what actually happens with a nuke (since they apparently didn't study WWII history and forgot about Hiroshima and Nagasaki) and that we're not afraid to use it again.

-------------

I'll leave you on a happier, less depressing shameless plug. This one is brought to you by my man Hopper, who is writing his first-ever-paid movie column today. Show him some love and go check it out! It's about Hollywood's latest comedy, Year One, and since it has Jack Black, you know it's going to be a tongue-in-cheek, witty, intelligent comedy. Now, if you're in St Pete, get out there and enjoy this beautiful morning before it turns oppressive later today. Word is, it's supposed to be 96° again today, with a heat index approaching 110°. Hope the A/C's working at your place! And if you're in Philly right now, don't forget your umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh, cause it looks like it's gonna be on-and-off rain today. Stay cool/dry out there today!

Low-Speed Hijinx

Greetings and salutations, everyone! Enjoy the Rays complete and utter domination over De La Rosa last night? Well, here's a little surprise for you out there who thought you'd never see this: Pat Burrell will (most likely) start in right tonight! Going 11-16 against tonight's starter for the Rockies, Aaron Cook, will kinda make you all that more valuable. Considering he's fresh from rehab and sporting the new porn-star goatee (which I will get a pic of...promise!), it hopefully will be a sign of things to come. David Price is on the mound tonight, hoping to rebound from a win that was more ugly than some losses I've seen (while only getting a 2.37 ERA, he threw 105 pitches in only 4 1/3 innings and giving up 6 walks, though he did have 6 Ks, too). He, like Pat the Bat, will come around in time, I'm sure.

So, did you hear? SEPTA, our friendly neighborhood mass transit system up in Philly (more like the TBARTA will be than PSTA is) looks like it was the butt of a joke recently, and they seem none too thrilled. According to today's Inquirer, sometime overnight the pranksters placed a sign - of high-quality and pretty authentic-looking, I might say - with the following text on many of SEPTA's main routes:


Courtesy: DesignPhiladelphia

"The Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority (SEPTA) is committed to providing non-discriminatory transportation services to all of its passengers, including schizophrenics, drug addicts, Irish Catholics, hipsters, homos, prostitutes, gentrifying transplants, raging maniacs, tourists, obnoxious Penn students, corner boys, pimps, drunk rich kids who still think Old City is cool, and terrified suburbanites who tremble with unease at the sight of everyone.

"Any person who is or seeks to be a patron of any SEPTA public vehicle shall be entitled to the same depressing experience of loud cell phones, obese people eating McDonalds, parents telling their toddlers to "Shut the Fuck Up!", and a constant inch-deep layer of urine-soaked trash and debris.

"No person or group of persons shall be discriminated against on any grounds with regard to routing, scheduling, or quality of transportation service furnished by SEPTA, with the following exceptions - race, color, socioeconomic status, and proximity to the suburbs.

"Any person who has experienced a cleaner, more efficient, more extensive, and better managed public transportation system in the U.S. (e.g. most if not all) can feel free to notify SEPTA about potential improvements, which shall promptly be ignored."

Apparently, these jokers have been practicing for a while, because they were able to get these pretty large signs up and under the protective glass where the advertisements usually peer upon said groups. Keep in mind I'm not easily offended, but from a practical joke standpoint, that was pretty damn funny! I can see why SEPTA would be offended, but let's face it; if they'd clean up the problems they're being lampooned over in the first place, this wouldn't be nearly as comical. But anyone who's ridden the El knows what I'm talking about: it's funny because it's true!

I'm not saying it's a bad thing, mind you, because those groups listed make it a diverse and interesting ride. In fact, I can't wait until TBARTA (God, I hope they change the name; that's a mouthful!) gets going and I can experience the atmosphere it will showcase. You really can't experience a region's true identity until you've taken a trip on its mass transit system, and seeing as we have really nothing here in Tampa Bay - except for sketchy, local bus-only companies like PSTA, HART, PCPT - tourists not only don't get the full extent of our rich culture and heritage, but they also get nowhere fast without renting a car.

(Side note and shameless plug for a fellow blogger: to get the full extent of what a mass transit system means to a region, check out the great piece my man Brad Maule over at PhillySkyline.com did on SEPTA and the Independence Pass. It gives you an idea of what I mean about mass transit showcasing the culture - both really good and brutally honest - of an area. Great work on that, Brad and the rest of the gang over there!)

So, do I think the "rapscallions" who did this deserve to be punished? If only for vandalism - since it is private property - and not anything regarding their "potentially offensive" language. Are they right about it? In a broad aspect, yes, but not to the level they took it. Is it hysterical? Abso-freakin-lutely! If I ever saw them on a train down here doing that, I wouldn't help them, but you're damn right I'd cheer them on! Everyone needs a good laugh once in a while, even at the expense of your self-dignity. Nothing's funnier than pointing out your own flaws, trust me.

Alright, kids. Two games tonight at the same bat times as last night, but different bat channel for the Phils - only outside the Delaware Valley and Greater Toronto, however - who play the Blue Jays (which, besides being a Phils phan, needs them to win so the Rays can take sole possession of 3rd) at 7:05 on ESPN (CSN in Philly, SNET in Toronto). The Rays play the Rockies again @ 8:40 EDT on Sun Sports in Tampa Bay/FSN in Denver. Speaking of the Mile-High City, if youre in the area, don't forget to get your free meal from Johnny's New York Pizza and Pasta Store in Lakewood; just wear your Rays blue & gold today only to get dinner on the house. Talk of food's making me hungry...you think they deliver to St. Pete?

- Big thanks goes out to Kevin Derrick over at DesignPhiladelphia for the SEPTA sign pic!