So, I’ve had a terrible case of “writer’s block”, which is why I haven’t posted on this blog since my observation on the Supreme Court of Public Opinion case #2009-0618, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, musca domestica, et. al. vs. Barack H. Obama, President of the United States. Sometimes, however, life has a funny way of dropping something so pertinent to you right on your lap you’d be insane not to approach it. Thus, let me finish this paragraph by stating this: Kevin, I know you and I strongly recommend you look away from the rest of this blog now – you know what’s coming.
Tropicana Field: loathe it or love it, it is the home of the Tampa Bay Rays; has hosted, among others in its 19-year history, the following large-scale events: the largest one-night indoor concert in Florida, NCAA Men’s Final Four, the Davis Cup, the NHL Playoffs, ArenaBowl IX, and – oh yeah – the World Series; and, contrary to popular opinion, is centrally located near the population center of the Bay Area. So, why is it people can pack the Trop when it’s a “gala event” (like the playoffs, the World Series, or the raising of the banners), but when – God-forbid – you need to actually watch the game and not just sit in a seat and take pictures to say, “Look where I was!” the sea of blue you see on TV is not people, but empty seats? What possesses the people of Florida – not just Tampa Bay, as the same phenomenon is occurring in both Miami and Jacksonville – to be apathetic toward something so community-driven that other cities would kill to have?
Let’s first take a look at some of the excuses and see if they can’t be debunked. The biggest excuse that people – mainly from Tampa and to the northeast – have is the time and distance. As a St. Pete resident of 6 years, I can safely say that argument is a load of crap. The worst direction to travel during either rush hour is toward Tampa. The bridges feed into Tampa’s overworked, outdated road system that can’t handle normal everyday traffic. Add the 5-10,000 extra vehicles that will appear on the Howard Frankland, Gandy, or Courtney Campbell bridges during that rush – in which most games are played, and no one would make it leaving at 5:30pm from Pinellas to the stadium, irregardless of the placement in the city, by opening pitch without pushing start times past 7:30pm; it will be near impossible to have Bob DuPry’s office to sign off on that. So, until TBARTA gets going, no place in the area will be convenient enough for everyone.
Speaking of TBARTA, the next issue is its location in general. Having been built in downtown St. Pete, which most consider “isolated” from the area since it’s on a peninsula, makes it that much more impossible to break that impervious across Tampa Bay known as the Hillsborough/Pinellas county line. However, a new study the ABC Coalition published today in the St. Petersburg Times shows 5 different locations and the population within 30 miles of each. Downtown St. Pete has the least, but at 2,245,129, it is within 100,000 of the “top spot”, Downtown Tampa. Also, with TBARTA planning to build a transportation hub right near the Trop location that will make it easily accessible by rail from Clearwater, Tampa, Brandon, Plant City, Wesley Chapel, and possibly New Port Richey, and express busses from northern Pinellas, Bradenton, Sarasota, Brooksville, Crystal River, Lakeland, and all points in between, Downtown St. Pete just became that much more attractive. Granted, it’ll take 5 years – if started today – for the first signs of TBARTA’s impact, but seeing as it takes 3-4 years to build a stadium when you don’t have a billion dollars to throw around like the Yankees and Mets, you need to consider those transportation nodes in the final decision of stadium location.
While we’re talking bottomless bank rolls, let’s talk another favorite topic: dollars and “sense”. Everyone said the original deal to put it on the waterfront for $450 million was “too expensive.” However, those same people arguing it will cost too much also want a $471 million rehab of Tropicana Field. To that I quote Carlos Mencia: “DEE-Dee-dee!!!” Thanks for “protecting our wallets” on that one, POWW. So, according to citizens of Tampa, it either needs to be in Tampa, since it’s the “population center” (which it’s geographically not; including Bradenton and Sarasota, that distinction belongs about 83rd Ave N and 4th St N in St. Pete), or at the very north end of St. Pete so people from Tampa “don’t need to drive as far.” However, there’s no city- or county-owned land up in the Gateway area, as that area of St. Pete is known, that doesn’t require mitigation; same goes with Tampa. So, if Tampa or Gateway are the “prime spots,” why would we up the price of the stadium by up to $150 million in land acquisition and/or landfill mitigation costs just to kowtow to the demands of an extra 100,000? I don’t know about you, but an investment of up to $1.5 million per person for people who may never go to a game seems like wasted money.
Another issue is the play on the field. “Why should I support a team that is barely over .500?” I’ll give you one major reason why: we went to the World Series last year. How’s that for a “what have you done for me lately” retort? They have a winning record! They’re playing surprisingly well in spite of major injuries that took out, for some length of time, the following people (in no particular order): Chad Bradford, Scott Kazmir, Troy Percival, Jason Isringhausen, Jason Bartlett, Aki Iwamura, Evan Longoria, and Pat Burrell (I’m sure I forgot some along the way, too). That’s almost a whole freakin’ team on the DL! Yet they’re three games over .500 – something that would have seemed like a Godsend 2 years ago – and are still within reach of the AL East crown. Granted, in every other division, 38-35 would be good enough for at least 3rd (2nd in the AL Central and NL East), but this isn’t every other division, and I think that’s why the fans are very fickle. However, it’s not excuse. Here’s a list of teams with worse records than us (as of Wednesday) that have better attendance averages (in order of attendance, records and place in division in parentheses): Cubs (34-34, 3rd), Mets (36-34, 2nd), Astros (32-37, 5th), Rockies (37-35, 3rd), Mariners (36-35, 3rd), Twins (36-37, 2nd), D-Backs (30-42, 5th), Braves (34-37, 4th), White Sox (34-37, 3rd), Padres (31-39, 4th), Reds (34-36, 3rd), and Royals (31-39, 4th). In fact, we are one of only two teams that have winning records that are in the bottom 20 – the other being the Marlins (37-36, 3rd) at 29th. See? It’s not just Tampa Bay with the attendance issues.
And that brings me to the bigger issue: are we, as Phloridians (again, my blog, my spelling rules), apathetic to sports in general? The only team that has had no attendance issues anywhere in Phlorida was the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but that’s about to change with the loss of most of the season ticket holders due to the economy. So what is the root cause of it? What would create such an indifference to teams and franchises that areas like San Antonio, Portland, Hampton Roads, and especially Las Vegas are pushing hard to secure? Do we just, like the sun, sand, and surf, take them for granted that they’ll always be here? Or is it more of an inherent issue? I can honestly see the problem with hockey as a whole in the Sunshine State, as there is no history or pedigree throughout history here (one Stanley Cup doesn’t erase 70 years of isolation from the sport). However, football should be huge here, and it is: at the college level. The pro teams are struggling to fill seats; the Jags are on the verge of moving to Toronto (!) if revenue doesn’t pick back up, and with no naming rights to Jacksonville Municipal Stadium, I don’t foresee that happening in the near-term. The Dolphins are struggling in a tough division and can’t get enough people in the seats to expand the payroll and get better players. The Bucs’ waiting list evaporated almost overnight, and now they’re soliciting me to get a ticket package (just because I’m a Rays’ holder doesn’t mean I would support the team that embarrassed the Eagles in Philly twice in one year’s time). Baseball also has a long, storied history here, but mainly through Spring Training. But the excitement of March seems to quickly wear off as the attention spans of the natives get bored and move to the next big thing.
From this writer’s perspective, it seems like the main issue is Phlorida’s ingrained obsession with vanity. They do what they can, however they can, to be noticed. Look at South Beach as a prime example. In and of itself, it’s nothing more than a very nice beach town found at any oceanfront state (the Hamptons in New York, Avalon in New Jersey, Nags Head in North Carolina, Myrtle Beach in South Carolina, amongst many others). However, the rich and famous hang out there, songs like “Miami” by Will Smith celebrate it, and TV shows like “Burn Notice” make it a living, breathing character along side the cast. That’s why people feel the need to go to South Beach; not because the sand is made of gold or it houses the Fountain of Youth, but because they can be seen. Clearwater Beach has just as nice – if not better – beaches, and there’s just as much money in those condos as the condos on the other side of the state, but it’s not as glorified. Why? Because no one will see you there except for that tourist from Montreal. That’s why the Rays can sell out the playoffs, but can’t get rid of tickets for a World Series rematch. That’s why the Lightning set attendance records at the Thunderdome (now known as Tropicana Field) during the playoffs, but can’t get more than 7,000 people to attend an average game at the Forum (neé Ice Palace). That’s why the Jaguars haven’t sold out a game in almost a year, and the Magic, on their historic playoff run, couldn’t get a full house until the Finals. Unless people will notice you, Phloridians just can’t waste their time with trivialities like sports. But then, this argument doesn’t hold much water when, in California, the geographical center of vanity, the Dodgers and Lakers sell out games constantly, does it?
So, what is it? Why are sports as a whole, not just the Rays and their red-headed adopted son known as the Trop, neglected in this state? Why can a meaningless Spring Training series between the Rays and the Phillies in Philadelphia sell out (about 90K people over two games), but the same series in St. Pete with both teams fighting for position in their respective division can’t draw more than 60K people for three? What makes people spend more time in a bikini or swim trunks getting the early stages of melanoma instead of spending money on organizations that provide money and supplies to both youth and adult non-profit organizations alike? Why do we, as a state, demand new facilities and/or locations for these teams, only to shun them the same way we did before with the same tired excuses, just amended to fit the new situation?
As someone who loves sports, I can’t understand it. All I can understand is no matter where the Rays new stadium is built, be it Tampa, Downtown St. Pete, or an island in the middle of Tampa Bay with off ramps right off the Howard Frankland and hydrofoils from locations every 2 miles along the bay’s shoreline for those who don’t want to drive, some group will complain about the distance, the money, the team’s performance; you know, the same excuses that have been used for years. And that’s just how Phlorida is; nothing changes, no matter how many people you try to cater to.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Insane in the Membrane
President Barack Hussein Obama is a murderer! The man who ran on a campaign of "peace" and "change" took an innocent life - on film, no less! - and laughed as the carcass of his fallen enemy lain there on the carpet. No trial, no jury, no judge. He was the law at that moment, and because this harmless being simply "got on his nerves", he slew the helpless fool in cold blood. He could have at least imprisoned and then set him free, but no; Obama said, "Damn the Constitution!" and took its life. This man is deplorable and should be executed.
That's what our resident whack-jobs over at PETA what you to think, anyway. Why now, you ask? Oh? Did you not see the footage? Well, let me show you:
That's right, ladies and gentlemen; your president, the one (don't debate me on this statement, I don't wanna hear it on this post!) doing his best to clean up the mess both George W. Bush and Bill Clinton put us in is being accused, not of the typical, "left-wing liberal commie" crap, but killing an "innocent" fly by your friends at the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. My, oh my, talk about an organization that has lost its meaning.
PETA was started in 1980 as an organization dedicated to make sure four key things were monitored: 1.) Hollywood didn't mistreat animals, 2.) the fur trade was stopped, 3.) animal testing was either humanely done or stopped altogether, and 4.) farm animals were kept out of deplorable conditions. However, since the beginning, their methodology on safeguarding their core values has always been controversial. Throwing paint on fur coats, harassing lab workers in the streets, and suing movie lots are just some of the stunts this group has performed.
Once they realized this garnered them attention (like they say, bad publicity is better than none at all), they started to expand into the realm of the absurd, like suggesting fishing is the same as sticking a hook in your dog's eye, or eating beef is equivalent to dining on a monkey. They have even chastised sports athletes such as Shane Victorino for eating Spam, a much-maligned (yet pretty decent if cooked right) food considered a staple in his native Hawaii. But now, I can truly say I've seen it all.
They are sending President Obama a "humane fly trap" so he can catch the annoying pest that is known to carry diseases such as typhoid, cholera, and dysentery, and release it back into the wild. They said he should not "glorify" the killing of any creature and, as a role-model, should "know better."
(Before I continue, I want to point out I'm not at all against "animal rights" - thought I don't like that term. I love dogs and cats, and nothing should ever happen to them, such as beatings, over breeding, and even neglect; it breaks my heart to see that. However, there are some animals humans have used as food for 10,000 years, and until the last 150, did it humanely. I agree that furs from chinchillas shouldn't be harvested simply for a coat; the whole chinchilla should be used, either as dog food or helping to feed the homeless. Same thing goes for seal pelts and any other creatures that are useful to everyone. Over-harvesting is bad, too, and that should be monitored, or some animals will go the way of the dodo. But don't bitch at me for eating venison or call me a "murderer" because I have an ivory chess set. So long as it's done in an ecologically-sane and humane manner, we're the top of the food chain and we have every right to act that way.)
So, here's a solution I think most people can agree with: because there is a major over-population issue with this planet (6.4 billion and growing) and we're trying to rid ourselves of the idiots roaming around, why not round up every card-carrying member of PETA and anyone who believes their BS, put them all on some secluded island out in the Atlantic that no one lives at now, and drop a nuke on them. Solves three issues: 1.) reduces the population, 2.) gets rid of whack jobs, and 3.) shows countries like North Korea and Iran what actually happens with a nuke (since they apparently didn't study WWII history and forgot about Hiroshima and Nagasaki) and that we're not afraid to use it again.
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I'll leave you on a happier, less depressing shameless plug. This one is brought to you by my man Hopper, who is writing his first-ever-paid movie column today. Show him some love and go check it out! It's about Hollywood's latest comedy, Year One, and since it has Jack Black, you know it's going to be a tongue-in-cheek, witty, intelligent comedy. Now, if you're in St Pete, get out there and enjoy this beautiful morning before it turns oppressive later today. Word is, it's supposed to be 96° again today, with a heat index approaching 110°. Hope the A/C's working at your place! And if you're in Philly right now, don't forget your umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh, cause it looks like it's gonna be on-and-off rain today. Stay cool/dry out there today!
That's what our resident whack-jobs over at PETA what you to think, anyway. Why now, you ask? Oh? Did you not see the footage? Well, let me show you:
That's right, ladies and gentlemen; your president, the one (don't debate me on this statement, I don't wanna hear it on this post!) doing his best to clean up the mess both George W. Bush and Bill Clinton put us in is being accused, not of the typical, "left-wing liberal commie" crap, but killing an "innocent" fly by your friends at the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. My, oh my, talk about an organization that has lost its meaning.
PETA was started in 1980 as an organization dedicated to make sure four key things were monitored: 1.) Hollywood didn't mistreat animals, 2.) the fur trade was stopped, 3.) animal testing was either humanely done or stopped altogether, and 4.) farm animals were kept out of deplorable conditions. However, since the beginning, their methodology on safeguarding their core values has always been controversial. Throwing paint on fur coats, harassing lab workers in the streets, and suing movie lots are just some of the stunts this group has performed.
Once they realized this garnered them attention (like they say, bad publicity is better than none at all), they started to expand into the realm of the absurd, like suggesting fishing is the same as sticking a hook in your dog's eye, or eating beef is equivalent to dining on a monkey. They have even chastised sports athletes such as Shane Victorino for eating Spam, a much-maligned (yet pretty decent if cooked right) food considered a staple in his native Hawaii. But now, I can truly say I've seen it all.
They are sending President Obama a "humane fly trap" so he can catch the annoying pest that is known to carry diseases such as typhoid, cholera, and dysentery, and release it back into the wild. They said he should not "glorify" the killing of any creature and, as a role-model, should "know better."
(Before I continue, I want to point out I'm not at all against "animal rights" - thought I don't like that term. I love dogs and cats, and nothing should ever happen to them, such as beatings, over breeding, and even neglect; it breaks my heart to see that. However, there are some animals humans have used as food for 10,000 years, and until the last 150, did it humanely. I agree that furs from chinchillas shouldn't be harvested simply for a coat; the whole chinchilla should be used, either as dog food or helping to feed the homeless. Same thing goes for seal pelts and any other creatures that are useful to everyone. Over-harvesting is bad, too, and that should be monitored, or some animals will go the way of the dodo. But don't bitch at me for eating venison or call me a "murderer" because I have an ivory chess set. So long as it's done in an ecologically-sane and humane manner, we're the top of the food chain and we have every right to act that way.)
So, here's a solution I think most people can agree with: because there is a major over-population issue with this planet (6.4 billion and growing) and we're trying to rid ourselves of the idiots roaming around, why not round up every card-carrying member of PETA and anyone who believes their BS, put them all on some secluded island out in the Atlantic that no one lives at now, and drop a nuke on them. Solves three issues: 1.) reduces the population, 2.) gets rid of whack jobs, and 3.) shows countries like North Korea and Iran what actually happens with a nuke (since they apparently didn't study WWII history and forgot about Hiroshima and Nagasaki) and that we're not afraid to use it again.
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I'll leave you on a happier, less depressing shameless plug. This one is brought to you by my man Hopper, who is writing his first-ever-paid movie column today. Show him some love and go check it out! It's about Hollywood's latest comedy, Year One, and since it has Jack Black, you know it's going to be a tongue-in-cheek, witty, intelligent comedy. Now, if you're in St Pete, get out there and enjoy this beautiful morning before it turns oppressive later today. Word is, it's supposed to be 96° again today, with a heat index approaching 110°. Hope the A/C's working at your place! And if you're in Philly right now, don't forget your umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh, cause it looks like it's gonna be on-and-off rain today. Stay cool/dry out there today!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Low-Speed Hijinx
Greetings and salutations, everyone! Enjoy the Rays complete and utter domination over De La Rosa last night? Well, here's a little surprise for you out there who thought you'd never see this: Pat Burrell will (most likely) start in right tonight! Going 11-16 against tonight's starter for the Rockies, Aaron Cook, will kinda make you all that more valuable. Considering he's fresh from rehab and sporting the new porn-star goatee (which I will get a pic of...promise!), it hopefully will be a sign of things to come. David Price is on the mound tonight, hoping to rebound from a win that was more ugly than some losses I've seen (while only getting a 2.37 ERA, he threw 105 pitches in only 4 1/3 innings and giving up 6 walks, though he did have 6 Ks, too). He, like Pat the Bat, will come around in time, I'm sure.
So, did you hear? SEPTA, our friendly neighborhood mass transit system up in Philly (more like the TBARTA will be than PSTA is) looks like it was the butt of a joke recently, and they seem none too thrilled. According to today's Inquirer, sometime overnight the pranksters placed a sign - of high-quality and pretty authentic-looking, I might say - with the following text on many of SEPTA's main routes:
Courtesy: DesignPhiladelphia
I'm not saying it's a bad thing, mind you, because those groups listed make it a diverse and interesting ride. In fact, I can't wait until TBARTA (God, I hope they change the name; that's a mouthful!) gets going and I can experience the atmosphere it will showcase. You really can't experience a region's true identity until you've taken a trip on its mass transit system, and seeing as we have really nothing here in Tampa Bay - except for sketchy, local bus-only companies like PSTA, HART, PCPT - tourists not only don't get the full extent of our rich culture and heritage, but they also get nowhere fast without renting a car.
(Side note and shameless plug for a fellow blogger: to get the full extent of what a mass transit system means to a region, check out the great piece my man Brad Maule over at PhillySkyline.com did on SEPTA and the Independence Pass. It gives you an idea of what I mean about mass transit showcasing the culture - both really good and brutally honest - of an area. Great work on that, Brad and the rest of the gang over there!)
So, do I think the "rapscallions" who did this deserve to be punished? If only for vandalism - since it is private property - and not anything regarding their "potentially offensive" language. Are they right about it? In a broad aspect, yes, but not to the level they took it. Is it hysterical? Abso-freakin-lutely! If I ever saw them on a train down here doing that, I wouldn't help them, but you're damn right I'd cheer them on! Everyone needs a good laugh once in a while, even at the expense of your self-dignity. Nothing's funnier than pointing out your own flaws, trust me.
Alright, kids. Two games tonight at the same bat times as last night, but different bat channel for the Phils - only outside the Delaware Valley and Greater Toronto, however - who play the Blue Jays (which, besides being a Phils phan, needs them to win so the Rays can take sole possession of 3rd) at 7:05 on ESPN (CSN in Philly, SNET in Toronto). The Rays play the Rockies again @ 8:40 EDT on Sun Sports in Tampa Bay/FSN in Denver. Speaking of the Mile-High City, if youre in the area, don't forget to get your free meal from Johnny's New York Pizza and Pasta Store in Lakewood; just wear your Rays blue & gold today only to get dinner on the house. Talk of food's making me hungry...you think they deliver to St. Pete?
- Big thanks goes out to Kevin Derrick over at DesignPhiladelphia for the SEPTA sign pic!
So, did you hear? SEPTA, our friendly neighborhood mass transit system up in Philly (more like the TBARTA will be than PSTA is) looks like it was the butt of a joke recently, and they seem none too thrilled. According to today's Inquirer, sometime overnight the pranksters placed a sign - of high-quality and pretty authentic-looking, I might say - with the following text on many of SEPTA's main routes:
Courtesy: DesignPhiladelphia
"The Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority (SEPTA) is committed to providing non-discriminatory transportation services to all of its passengers, including schizophrenics, drug addicts, Irish Catholics, hipsters, homos, prostitutes, gentrifying transplants, raging maniacs, tourists, obnoxious Penn students, corner boys, pimps, drunk rich kids who still think Old City is cool, and terrified suburbanites who tremble with unease at the sight of everyone.Apparently, these jokers have been practicing for a while, because they were able to get these pretty large signs up and under the protective glass where the advertisements usually peer upon said groups. Keep in mind I'm not easily offended, but from a practical joke standpoint, that was pretty damn funny! I can see why SEPTA would be offended, but let's face it; if they'd clean up the problems they're being lampooned over in the first place, this wouldn't be nearly as comical. But anyone who's ridden the El knows what I'm talking about: it's funny because it's true!"Any person who is or seeks to be a patron of any SEPTA public vehicle shall be entitled to the same depressing experience of loud cell phones, obese people eating McDonalds, parents telling their toddlers to "Shut the Fuck Up!", and a constant inch-deep layer of urine-soaked trash and debris.
"No person or group of persons shall be discriminated against on any grounds with regard to routing, scheduling, or quality of transportation service furnished by SEPTA, with the following exceptions - race, color, socioeconomic status, and proximity to the suburbs.
"Any person who has experienced a cleaner, more efficient, more extensive, and better managed public transportation system in the U.S. (e.g. most if not all) can feel free to notify SEPTA about potential improvements, which shall promptly be ignored."
I'm not saying it's a bad thing, mind you, because those groups listed make it a diverse and interesting ride. In fact, I can't wait until TBARTA (God, I hope they change the name; that's a mouthful!) gets going and I can experience the atmosphere it will showcase. You really can't experience a region's true identity until you've taken a trip on its mass transit system, and seeing as we have really nothing here in Tampa Bay - except for sketchy, local bus-only companies like PSTA, HART, PCPT - tourists not only don't get the full extent of our rich culture and heritage, but they also get nowhere fast without renting a car.
(Side note and shameless plug for a fellow blogger: to get the full extent of what a mass transit system means to a region, check out the great piece my man Brad Maule over at PhillySkyline.com did on SEPTA and the Independence Pass. It gives you an idea of what I mean about mass transit showcasing the culture - both really good and brutally honest - of an area. Great work on that, Brad and the rest of the gang over there!)
So, do I think the "rapscallions" who did this deserve to be punished? If only for vandalism - since it is private property - and not anything regarding their "potentially offensive" language. Are they right about it? In a broad aspect, yes, but not to the level they took it. Is it hysterical? Abso-freakin-lutely! If I ever saw them on a train down here doing that, I wouldn't help them, but you're damn right I'd cheer them on! Everyone needs a good laugh once in a while, even at the expense of your self-dignity. Nothing's funnier than pointing out your own flaws, trust me.
Alright, kids. Two games tonight at the same bat times as last night, but different bat channel for the Phils - only outside the Delaware Valley and Greater Toronto, however - who play the Blue Jays (which, besides being a Phils phan, needs them to win so the Rays can take sole possession of 3rd) at 7:05 on ESPN (CSN in Philly, SNET in Toronto). The Rays play the Rockies again @ 8:40 EDT on Sun Sports in Tampa Bay/FSN in Denver. Speaking of the Mile-High City, if youre in the area, don't forget to get your free meal from Johnny's New York Pizza and Pasta Store in Lakewood; just wear your Rays blue & gold today only to get dinner on the house. Talk of food's making me hungry...you think they deliver to St. Pete?
- Big thanks goes out to Kevin Derrick over at DesignPhiladelphia for the SEPTA sign pic!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Come Back and Do the Trop
No, this post is not about baseball (which, the Rays are in Denver tonight @ 8:40, and the Phils are hosting Canada's Last Hope @ 7:05, so watch them!), nor is it about the latest news regarding Tropicana Field's fate (which won't be mentioned at all on this blog until something substantial comes along, I promise); it's about Tropicana orange juice - that stalwart of breakfast tables across America - and advertising ideas gone horribly wrong. I know, an introspective on bad ideas not performed by myself is a departure for me too, but there's a first time for everything, right?
Today's Tropicana Products, a subsidiary of PepsiCo, started back in 1947, when Anthony Rossi moved from New York to Palmetto - just south of St. Pete on the other side of Tampa Bay - and started Manatee River Packing Company, a packing plant for fruit box gifts and fruits destined to be thrown on salads. Then, in 1952, he bought an old cannery in Bradenton, which is now the home of the Tropicana processing plant. The familiar "Tropicana" name game from their premium juice they provided, and the company took that name as their own in 1957. Pepsi bought them in 1998, and the rest is history.
For many years, they've had one of the most recognizable logos in advertising history: the fresh-picked orange, dew still dripping off of it, with a straw in it. It's meant to symbolize the freshness of the juice, as it really does taste fresh-squeezed. I, amongst millions of people daily, enjoy a cold glass of OJ in the morning (pulp-free, please!), and have grown to love that little orange being massacred with a plastic drinking utensil. Thanks for taking one for the team, little guy!
However, at the beginning of the year, PepsiCo committed its own "New Coke"-sized faux pas, changing that beloved death-by-straw orange into this:
Classy? I guess. Bland? Completely. Enticing? Meh, not really. It's just a glass of orange juice, nothing special or fancy. Now, if it came with its own champagne or vodka, I'd be more likely to buy it, but since mimosas and screwdrivers in the morning right before work could be hazardous both to your driving and career longevity, that's probably not the image you want to go for. And apparently Pepsi realize they messed up, too, because it was changed quickly thereafter back to the lovable, drinkable orange.
So, that brings me to the reason for this blog post: marketing failures. And this is where I ask for audience participation. Other than the "New Coke" fiasco, what big advertising "miscalculations" stick out in your mind? I'm curious to see what others consider an Epic Fail.
Alright, I'm outta here. Don't forget, the Phils are on CSN at 7:05 and the Rays are on Sun Sports at 8:40. Oh, and if you're out in Denver, don't forget to don your Rays gear and head out to Johnny’s New York Pizza & Pasta Shop in Lakewood tomorrow to get your free meal, since the Rays still made it to the World Series. See? The Rays may not have won, but they're still honored across the country for being bad-ass last year!
Today's Tropicana Products, a subsidiary of PepsiCo, started back in 1947, when Anthony Rossi moved from New York to Palmetto - just south of St. Pete on the other side of Tampa Bay - and started Manatee River Packing Company, a packing plant for fruit box gifts and fruits destined to be thrown on salads. Then, in 1952, he bought an old cannery in Bradenton, which is now the home of the Tropicana processing plant. The familiar "Tropicana" name game from their premium juice they provided, and the company took that name as their own in 1957. Pepsi bought them in 1998, and the rest is history.
For many years, they've had one of the most recognizable logos in advertising history: the fresh-picked orange, dew still dripping off of it, with a straw in it. It's meant to symbolize the freshness of the juice, as it really does taste fresh-squeezed. I, amongst millions of people daily, enjoy a cold glass of OJ in the morning (pulp-free, please!), and have grown to love that little orange being massacred with a plastic drinking utensil. Thanks for taking one for the team, little guy!However, at the beginning of the year, PepsiCo committed its own "New Coke"-sized faux pas, changing that beloved death-by-straw orange into this:
Classy? I guess. Bland? Completely. Enticing? Meh, not really. It's just a glass of orange juice, nothing special or fancy. Now, if it came with its own champagne or vodka, I'd be more likely to buy it, but since mimosas and screwdrivers in the morning right before work could be hazardous both to your driving and career longevity, that's probably not the image you want to go for. And apparently Pepsi realize they messed up, too, because it was changed quickly thereafter back to the lovable, drinkable orange.
So, that brings me to the reason for this blog post: marketing failures. And this is where I ask for audience participation. Other than the "New Coke" fiasco, what big advertising "miscalculations" stick out in your mind? I'm curious to see what others consider an Epic Fail.
Alright, I'm outta here. Don't forget, the Phils are on CSN at 7:05 and the Rays are on Sun Sports at 8:40. Oh, and if you're out in Denver, don't forget to don your Rays gear and head out to Johnny’s New York Pizza & Pasta Shop in Lakewood tomorrow to get your free meal, since the Rays still made it to the World Series. See? The Rays may not have won, but they're still honored across the country for being bad-ass last year!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Monday Musings
Welcome to Monday Musings, a weekly section dedicated to pretty much anything that comes to my mind at random - which, if you know me, is pretty much like everything else I do.
How'd the weekend treat you? You see the Rays get their first 5-game win streak this season? Believe it or not, they're not doing that badly, considering they were only 7 games over .500 at the All-Star Break last year. The Phils also were able to get a win against those baastids from Boston, which the Rays desperately needed. (Speaking of, get ready for strictly-baseball talk 6/23-25...you know why!) Did anyone else see Pat Burrell sporting the goatee? Am I the only one who finds it a tad pornstar-ish and not really meant for him to wear? It was like the one time I tried to do that; God, it was awful! Some people just aren't meant to have facial hair, and that's a truth I accepted. As soon as your MC finds a pic of Pat the Bat as Ron Jeremy, you know he'll be posting it.
(Speaking of, I'm diligently trying to find a special gift for everyone to view. I'll let you know should I get my hands on it. If not, I'll put out a public appeal, but let's see where this road goes first. Stay tuned....)
Did anyone see the news this morning? Apparently, in our mayoral race here in St. Pete - the only election I've see that has more candidates than can fit on one webpage - one of the leading candidates, Deveron Gibbons, was endorsed by Gov. Charlie Crist. I'm going to keep my opinions to myself for right now on whom I endorse (I'll wait until the primary's closer), but I am going to question the logic behind accepting that nod. Gov. Crist, while once popular with more than 70% of the electorate, has since dropped to 62% since he decided to forgo a second term and run for US Senate, as well as sign SB 360, which basically reduces restrictions of development allowing urban density to be much larger than the road around it has the capacity for it. Basically put, a 12-story condo could be put on a 2-lane road and not need to expanded. That is not what Florida should, or can, become. So, while remains to be seen whether this endorsement will help or hurt Gibbons' campaign, I do know that his campaign now has that controversy attached to it, and that's not what he needs when running against a field of people that size. You need to stand out for the right reasons, and controversy's not it.
Alright, that's about enough musing for one Monday. Rays are off today, heading to Colorado, even though we're supposed to be playing the NL East this year and we won't be meeting the Braves, and so are Phils, who play Toronto at home tomorrow. Taking a cue from one of my friends, I'm gonna yank on YouTube and leave you with a special news bulletin:
You stay classy, St. Pete/Philly/wherever you call home.
How'd the weekend treat you? You see the Rays get their first 5-game win streak this season? Believe it or not, they're not doing that badly, considering they were only 7 games over .500 at the All-Star Break last year. The Phils also were able to get a win against those baastids from Boston, which the Rays desperately needed. (Speaking of, get ready for strictly-baseball talk 6/23-25...you know why!) Did anyone else see Pat Burrell sporting the goatee? Am I the only one who finds it a tad pornstar-ish and not really meant for him to wear? It was like the one time I tried to do that; God, it was awful! Some people just aren't meant to have facial hair, and that's a truth I accepted. As soon as your MC finds a pic of Pat the Bat as Ron Jeremy, you know he'll be posting it.
(Speaking of, I'm diligently trying to find a special gift for everyone to view. I'll let you know should I get my hands on it. If not, I'll put out a public appeal, but let's see where this road goes first. Stay tuned....)
Did anyone see the news this morning? Apparently, in our mayoral race here in St. Pete - the only election I've see that has more candidates than can fit on one webpage - one of the leading candidates, Deveron Gibbons, was endorsed by Gov. Charlie Crist. I'm going to keep my opinions to myself for right now on whom I endorse (I'll wait until the primary's closer), but I am going to question the logic behind accepting that nod. Gov. Crist, while once popular with more than 70% of the electorate, has since dropped to 62% since he decided to forgo a second term and run for US Senate, as well as sign SB 360, which basically reduces restrictions of development allowing urban density to be much larger than the road around it has the capacity for it. Basically put, a 12-story condo could be put on a 2-lane road and not need to expanded. That is not what Florida should, or can, become. So, while remains to be seen whether this endorsement will help or hurt Gibbons' campaign, I do know that his campaign now has that controversy attached to it, and that's not what he needs when running against a field of people that size. You need to stand out for the right reasons, and controversy's not it.
Alright, that's about enough musing for one Monday. Rays are off today, heading to Colorado, even though we're supposed to be playing the NL East this year and we won't be meeting the Braves, and so are Phils, who play Toronto at home tomorrow. Taking a cue from one of my friends, I'm gonna yank on YouTube and leave you with a special news bulletin:
You stay classy, St. Pete/Philly/wherever you call home.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Jumping In Head-First: A Primer
Alright, it looks like it's time to join the rest of the blogosphere and leave behind the random ramblings I posted on MySpace and make it happen on a more visible, "socially-acceptable" service. The reason I say it that way is because a friend of mine was dissuaded from reading my past rants and diatribes simply because it was on that site. There's nothing wrong with that train of thought, mind you, as I haven't been on MySpace in a while, and I've noticed a lot of my friends haven't, either. So, at some point, I'll migrate them over here for your viewing pleasure. You can see that they were helping me with an apparent evolution of my writing from - in retrospect - relatively crude and unrefined to...well, you be the judge.
I'm sorry, I didn't even introduce myself properly. My name's Jimbo and I'll be your MC for what I hope will be one of your bookmarks. If not, then I'll know for certain that I suck at writing and I'll go back to road tripping, which I know I'm good at. I'm a no-holds-barred kind of person and I expect, and look forward to, comments and discussions in the same light. I'm not easily offended, and because of that, I probably will offend unintentionally. Remember it's purely unintentional and I'll buy you a beer later to show you I still like you.
The topics discussed on this small slice of cyberspace will be like my personality: random, yet passionate. As the title implies, it'll do mainly with the goings-on of both my home region, the Delaware Valley, and the my current biosphere, Tampa Bay. Nothing is off-limits: sports, politics, happenings, history, and some broader topics, like music and national/international issues that affect us all. I know what you're thinking: "Jesus, not another one of these wackos that think he needs to be heard since the Adriana Huffington's and Perez Hilton's of the world got famous from it!" And you would be right. I mean, would anyone give a crap about any blogs at all if it wasn't for them (amongst better countless others), as reviled as they may or may not be, would the weblog be as popular as it is today? But am I doing this to be rich and famous? Hardly, as there are much easier ways: robbing banks and being a high-class mack/madam in large cities come to mind. I'm doing it for the same core reason each and everyone of us does this: because we can. Who said philosophy had to be complicated?
Here's where I have to give credit where credit is due, so you can skip to the next paragraph if you're not listed (warning: I'm just listing their nicknames - in no particular order, just the order I think of them - so no sappy emotional stuff needed nor warranted; I didn't just win a Grammy®, after all):
My Mom, who's a lot like Eileen Ripley, heroine of the Alien Quadrillogy
Hopper
Rabid Nick/Impoetry
B-Love
Richie Poo
Zombie Princess
Tonilicious
Becky
and anyone else I may have missed
That should about cover it today. Your MC has to leave for work soon, but he encourages you to watch both the Rays beat up the oh-my-God-can't-anyone-euthanize-them-and-spare-their-misery Nationals in St. Pete and the Phils and Red Sox slug it out yet again on South Broad Street; both games are on at 1:35pm today, so get your picture-in-picture ready and root, root, root for your home team - whichever one it may be. For me, I'm still debating that dilemma in my head.
I'm sorry, I didn't even introduce myself properly. My name's Jimbo and I'll be your MC for what I hope will be one of your bookmarks. If not, then I'll know for certain that I suck at writing and I'll go back to road tripping, which I know I'm good at. I'm a no-holds-barred kind of person and I expect, and look forward to, comments and discussions in the same light. I'm not easily offended, and because of that, I probably will offend unintentionally. Remember it's purely unintentional and I'll buy you a beer later to show you I still like you.
The topics discussed on this small slice of cyberspace will be like my personality: random, yet passionate. As the title implies, it'll do mainly with the goings-on of both my home region, the Delaware Valley, and the my current biosphere, Tampa Bay. Nothing is off-limits: sports, politics, happenings, history, and some broader topics, like music and national/international issues that affect us all. I know what you're thinking: "Jesus, not another one of these wackos that think he needs to be heard since the Adriana Huffington's and Perez Hilton's of the world got famous from it!" And you would be right. I mean, would anyone give a crap about any blogs at all if it wasn't for them (amongst better countless others), as reviled as they may or may not be, would the weblog be as popular as it is today? But am I doing this to be rich and famous? Hardly, as there are much easier ways: robbing banks and being a high-class mack/madam in large cities come to mind. I'm doing it for the same core reason each and everyone of us does this: because we can. Who said philosophy had to be complicated?
Here's where I have to give credit where credit is due, so you can skip to the next paragraph if you're not listed (warning: I'm just listing their nicknames - in no particular order, just the order I think of them - so no sappy emotional stuff needed nor warranted; I didn't just win a Grammy®, after all):
My Mom, who's a lot like Eileen Ripley, heroine of the Alien Quadrillogy
Hopper
Rabid Nick/Impoetry
B-Love
Richie Poo
Zombie Princess
Tonilicious
Becky
and anyone else I may have missed
That should about cover it today. Your MC has to leave for work soon, but he encourages you to watch both the Rays beat up the oh-my-God-can't-anyone-euthanize-them-and-spare-their-misery Nationals in St. Pete and the Phils and Red Sox slug it out yet again on South Broad Street; both games are on at 1:35pm today, so get your picture-in-picture ready and root, root, root for your home team - whichever one it may be. For me, I'm still debating that dilemma in my head.
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