From Philly to Phlorida: Random Musings of a Phan

What I've Been Doing All These Months....

2011-10-24T14:30:00.000-04:00

As I'm sure you're all aware (ha! like anyone reads my drivel), I've been neglecting to write anything on here for a while. Well, I haven't forgotten; I've been working on a side project of mine....

Presenting to you, my stadium reviews!

http://bit.ly/bundles/stpeterays/2

"What exactly is that?" you ask? Well, simply put, I review a stadium (not necessarily the team, though that factors in somewhat) for Stadium Journey and tell you all the things I like (or don't like) about them. Included in said reviews are (original post made at 1pm EDT on March 16, 2011):

USF's Raymond James Stadium in Tampa
Magic's Amway Center in Orlando
Rays' Tropicana Field in St. Petersburg
Lightning's St. Pete Times Forum in Tampa
Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Arena
UNF Arena in Jacksonville
FAU Arena in Boca Raton
B-CU's Moore Gymnasium in Daytona Beach
Stetson's Edmunds Center in DeLand
UCF Arena in Orlando
St. Pete Int'l Baseball's Al Lang Stadium in St. Petersburg
Orioles' Spring Training home of Ed Smith Stadium in Sarasota
Everblades' Germain Arena in Estero
Honda Grand Prix of St. Petersburg's Streets of St. Pete in St. Petersburg
Blue Jays' Florida Auto Exchange Stadium in Dunedin
Yankees' Steinbrenner Field in Tampa
Marauders' McKechnie Field in Bradenton
Threshers' Bright House Field in Clearwater
Stone Crabs' Charlotte Sports Park in Port Charlotte
Miracle's William Hammond Stadium in Fort Myers
Flying Tiger's Joker Marchant Stadium in Lakeland
Storm's St. Pete Times Forum in Tampa
Mets' Digital Domain Park in Port St. Lucie
Cardinals' Roger Dean Stadium in Jupiter
Predators' Amway Center in Orlando
Panthers' BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise
FC Tampa Bay's Al Lang Stadium in St. Petersburg

I'll update this post occasionally, adding my newest reviews here. And as always, if you have questions, please leave some love in the Comments section.

Later!

A Lesson Learned (The Hard Way)

2010-12-09T15:23:00.002-05:00

Being a Rays fan is hard; anyone who denies that is lying to themselves. We can never do anything right in the eyes of the world: we're a second-class team (there are three banners hanging from the rafters after April Fools' Day - and this isn't a joke - that will prove otherwise) playing in a second-class city (and Arlington, for some reason, isn't?) that has a second-class stadium (with guaranteed clear, 72°F weather 24/7 in the lightning capital of the US) with a second-class fan base that refuses to support the team. Cowbells aside, the Rays fans I've had the pleasure of meeting are as die-hard and passionate as their counterparts in long-established northern cities. Yet, for one tired reason, we're the most loathed fans in all of sports, even more so than Eagles' fans: our apparent apathy toward a stellar team.

This, however, needs to serve as a warning: the appearance of apathy – no matter how justified – will not only serve as fodder for the sports talk shows across the country, but keep true talent away from St. Petersburg and will drive outstanding homegrown talent away.

Baseball, like any other business, runs franchises for one reason and one reason only: to make as much of a profit as humanly possible. Do you firmly believe there are franchises in Toronto, Minneapolis, and Anaheim for the "betterment of the community," or to be an "exciting entertainment option"? No; they're strategically located across North America to get as much money as they can handle. They do this by selling merchandise, having broadcast deals with certain television networks, charging for seating to each and every game, and selling concessions at the stadium to keep those patrons fat and happy. They know that these four things will guarantee they can make ungodly amounts of money, and that's a fact we must live with, not just for this sport, but every sport in the world.

That said, the flip-side to such seemingly-rampant capitalism is extra money to invest into the team in hopes of not only winning a championship, but also to increase the profits at an even greater rate. Buying their merchandise is a great start to increasing their take, but only a fraction of what you pay goes to the team; a greater portion goes to MLB, with even more going directly to the manufacturer. Broadcast rights are a great moneymaker, too, but they're based on pre-negotiated rates set years in advance – long before you even think of turning on the game – so any new advertising dollars the network may get go directly into their pockets, not the team's.

The only sure thing that you, as a fan, can do to make sure the team has enough money to operate in the manner you wish is to go to the games, plain and simple. The team makes the most money off of ticket sales, with concessions helping to pad the coffers even more. The more money the team makes, the more they can use in negotiating new, more-expensive contracts to attract high-quality talent to sunny St. Pete or keep the ones they already have.

"But the ticket prices are so expensive, especially in this economy, and I just can't afford to go!" I get that it's a burden; I'm living paycheck-to-paycheck myself and have a tough time meeting my bills on time. I also realize that by not giving the Rays money, they don't get to keep the Carl Crawfords and the Rafael Sorianos for anything more than either the initial rookie-arbitration periods or quick forays. The prices keep rising because of the Bostons, the Washingtons, and the New Yorks of the world paying players asinine amounts of money for mediocre talent, thereby causing the free agency market to be skewed out of whack (basically, it's a metaphor of the housing market that's caused us all to be paycheck-to-paycheck...if we're lucky). Blame MLB's Bud Selig all you want for not forcing a salary cap to be in place in lieu of higher-than-necessary ticket prices, but you can only blame yourself for letting our beloved outfielder slip through our fingers.

The question over attendance no longer pertains to the stadium drama; last night – the day that will be remembered in infamy by Rays fans the world over as the day our 2008 American League Championship seems decades ago, as we had a triple-shot of reality – proves once-and-for-all the question over attendance is really about getting talent here in the first place. Will we really want the team if we know the homegrown talent we've spent our blood, sweat, tears, and money on will just divest them in a few years time? If they're going to do that, will this area want to put out the commitment of tax revenue on a new stadium? Would you want to spend money to see a team that's dismantled due to budgetary constraints every few years?

The Rays brought up the stadium issue with the downtown St. Pete stadium on the waterfront in 2007 for a couple of reasons, but there was one that was so subtle, it wasn't caught until today: if they would have built it like they wanted, it'd be open 16 months from now, and Carl Crawford would be starting in its outfield – in blue and gold. We may not have been able to give him the big payday like they did in Beantown, but we'd have something they wouldn't: a new home. But that's the past and there's no point in lamenting it.

Let's learn from this mistake and prevent its repeat in 2016, when Evan Longoria's contract comes up for renewal. Sure, it sounds like a long time away, but take this into account: we signed him for 8 years at $44,000,000, and something tells me a Rookie of the Year and a few Gold Gloves will let him become worth a tad more than that. Knowing this now, however, will help us plan for its inevitability. Go to the games, spend some money at the stadium, and remember that you're doing your part to make sure Longo – as well as other young gems like David Price, B.J. Upton, Jeremy Hellickson, and many others – will be lifelong Rays.

Sure, it may be a sacrifice for you and your family to drive over the big, scary bridge, but this is what we have to deal with right now. My feelings on the whole stadium saga are well-documented on my other posts here on this blog, so I'm not gonna take one side or the other on this post; you just need to suck it up and support your team more than just thinking you're supporting the TV contract they grossly under-negotiated. The time for playing armchair manager is over; it may prove you're a loyal fan, but as much as it sucks to say, loyalty doesn't pay the bills.

Otherwise, when 2014 comes and the begging and the pleading by the Rays' PR department over those last four years failed to get you to the Trop, realize it's too late at that point to stop the ball from rolling and Longoria will be on his two-year long farewell tour. Just don't bitch to me when he's wearing pinstripes in 2017.

Why I'm a Diehard Rays Fan (and Closet Lightning Fan) - My Manifesto

2010-08-13T07:30:00.005-04:00

For the first 10 years of their life, the "Devil Rays" (as they were once infamously known) were the laughingstock of baseball, and arguably all of the sports world. They had Wade Boggs and what is considered his greatest moment, his 3,000th hit, though he would have had that anywhere; it was just happenstance he was wearing black, purple, and green and playing in a perpetually-maligned dome. They had the "Hit Show" - Jose Conseco, Fred McGriff, Vinny Castilla, and Greg Vaughn - which, needless to say, didn't live up to their hype. They never had an out-of-last-place season - let alone a winning season - save for one season, 2004, when they finished 4th in the AL East. They had homegrown stars - Josh Hamilton, Joe Kennedy, Aubrey Huff, Randy Winn - that went on to have much better careers after leaving their first home. They had an owner who not only refused to open his wallet, but also refused to allow cheering, screaming, and any type of loud noises anywhere in "his" stadium; anyone caught breaking this "rule" would be asked politely to quiet down, then on the next attempt to hush the "rabble-rouser" they would be evicted.

Yet, with all that documented extensively, I made a seemingly irrational decision one day in September 2007: I became a shareholder in the team of endless misery. Apparently, I am - myself - a glutton for punishment. After I signed the paperwork and handed over the check, the first thing I said to myself: "What the hell did I just do...?"

I grew up in Pedricktown, New Jersey. I'm sure - unless you live in Salem or Gloucester counties - you've never heard of it. It is, however, the most-rural suburb of Philadelphia, and as a member of the Delaware Valley, your sports allegiances are already dictated to you in the delivery room: Sixers, Flyers, Eagles, and Phillies are your only choices, so choose wisely or face the possibility of adoption. You're forgiven if you choose not to like any of the aforementioned teams, so long as you don't like any other team in their respective sports league. Some people believe in a bastardized version of the Amish's Rumspringa, where when you are old enough to think for yourself (usually anywhere between 9-13 years old), you can choose a different team in any and/or all sports. However, once you choose, you are bound to follow them ad infinitum. This explains how, in an area that is very staunchly against any team in any sport's division rivals, you will find some "brave" Cowboys, Devils, Braves, and Knicks fans.

I stayed true and exclusive to my "birth-rite" teams (though I never really followed the NBA to any great extent, so my indifference toward the Sixers is forgiven by most) until about 2006 - 3 years after I moved to St. Pete. Up until that time, I refused to set foot in the "Dumb Dome" and my baseball fix was obtained in the short month of March on the open, grassy surface of Bright House Field in Clearwater or the occasional Phillies game on Fox and Sun Sports (when they played the Marlins).

I got my hockey fix going to the two games per year the Flyers played at the St. Pete Times Forum and would only go to other games if I got free tickets from work, convinced friends (like Kevin and "Rabid Nick") I knew would like them to come with me, and I'd get to cheer against the Bolts (be it the Maple Leafs or the Mighty Ducks); the only exception to the "cheer against the Bolts" was when they played the Atlantic Division teams...for obviously-selfish reasons.

My football fix would come with going to the local Eagles bar, The Bull Horn on USF's campus, every week with my friend from work, Immani, that I found, too, likes the Birds. Even if it was "all-the-way" in Tampa, I was there for almost every game - unless it was shown on local Fox, CBS, or ABC TV so I could watch with my mom. You could always catch me there with my Irving Fryar, then David Akers Super Bowl, jersey, chanting "Fly, Eagles, Fly!" with the rest of them.

Never in a million years would I root against any of them, as they were my teams, my link to the snow-covered region I left back on that cold day of March 16, 2003.

Then I visited Al Lang Field.

In 2007, my then-roommate Becky suggested, instead of going to Clearwater in March, I should check-out the ballpark by the Bay in Downtown St. Pete. I just started my new job down the street the May prior, so I could park at work and walk over, making it even more convenient. Sure it may not be as new and shiny as Bright House Field, but Progress Energy Park (as Al Lang Field is now called) had the old Florida charm all the other spring training stadiums combined couldn't even muster, she said.

So, I took her up on her suggestion. We went to the first meeting of the Devil Rays and the Phillies that year at Al Lang, and what I was saw on the field impressed me and gave me hope for the future of the team. I knew this team wasn't far off from finally, after years of mediocrity, being a contender. I was watching history in the making, and I loved everything I saw.

And I wasn't talking about the Phillies.

The Devil Rays played a style of baseball I hadn't seen on Broad Street since I was young. They had guys like Carl Crawford and Delmon Young that were aggressive on the bases, they had guys like Carlos Peña and Akinori Iwamura that could hit the side of the Mahaffey Theater in Al Lang's outfield if they tried, and they had starting pitching out of Scott Kazmir and James Shields that made opposing batters cringe. Their bullpen, with people like Chad Orvella and Jae Kuk Ryu however, was anemic - to put it mildly - and made high-quality pitchers like Grant Balfour and J.P. Howell look just as bad. Once that was fixed, I knew they were going to be not just good, but very good. They showed up the Phillies that day, and as we walked back to my work parking lot, I told Becky, "Sure, I'll go to more games down here with you."

With the highly-publicized entrance of a new manager and ownership (the "Under Construction" campaign was extremely visible the entire 2005 season), they turned Tropicana Field from the "Dumb Dome" to "The Trop". Gone was the empty space on the walls that made it feel like the inside of an oil container or warehouse, and the redesign made it feel more like what a baseball field should feel like: large, easy-to-see stats boards and scoreboards, advertisements that felt more like those at Yankee Stadium, and what was once the largest-HDTV in baseball. On- and off-the-field, it felt like baseball finally arrived at the Trop...9 years late.

Despite Peña setting the team record for most HRs in a season (as well as leading the AL) and winning the AL's Comeback Player of the Year Award, Kazmir having the most strikeouts in the AL (and most in 162 games for all of baseball; Jake Peavy needed 163 days to beat him when San Diego played Arizona in a tie-breaker game), and Delmon Young being 2nd in voting for AL Rookie of the Year, the team still finished poorly: 66-96, worst in the majors, thanks in large part to the bullpen's over 6.00 ERA, worst in the majors in over 50 years. But the stage was set for greatness, and after going to over 20 regular season games through the course of the season - even when they took their tailspin in late June into August - I decided to invest in their future.

I became a season-ticket holder of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

"Sure hope you know what you're doing...." my conscience and checkbook both said. I'm sure glad I did, though, for - as everyone knows by now - the newly-christened "Tampa Bay Rays" kept winning and kept winning, making the playoffs for the first time in their history (not to mention it was their first-ever winning season), then continued to surprise as they went to the World Series in 2008 against (holy shit!) my Phillies. For the record, I wore my Devil Rays jersey - I got it on super-clearance at the end of the 2007 season for $50 (normally $200) - with my Rays hat only because my friend, Brad, was in town from Philly, so I had to balance out his Philly love. However, for Game 2, I wore my Phillies shirt with Rays hat. I didn't care whom won, as my "impossible dream" scenario came true.

I'm still a season-ticket holder of the Rays to this day. Even as the prices kept going up - and my pay at work went down - I cut corners to make it work, as I'm not about to give up my tickets; I love my Rays too much. I still love my Phillies and always will, but let's be honest: what do the Phillies do for my community? They don't help with youth sports funding in Tampa. They don't visit schools in New Port Richey to help add to the reading programs. They don't contribute $100 million to the economy of St. Petersburg every year. The closest they come to me in normal years during the season is Miami.

The Rays do all that, and more, for my new home. In that area, they are even greater than the 2008 World Series champions, and it took me a trip to Al Lang Field to finally admit that to myself.

The Lightning, on a smaller scale, contribute in the same aspects, but I don't carry a torch for them nearly as much as I do for the Rays; I don't however, boo them when I go anymore, and only cheer against them when Philly's in town. I can safely say I'm still a Flyers fan first, but I enjoy getting my hockey fix at the Forum on days that the "Orange Crush" doesn't take over the stands. So, in that aspect, I guess it makes me a Lightning fan, but don't expect me to choose between the two: it's not a choice - Broad Street Bullies all-the-way!

I can't say the same if I had to choose between the Rays and Phillies, nor should I have to. They never play each other except in spring training, occasional interleague games, and the World Series. They have (for the most-part, if I'm any indication) completely separate fan bases that work differently, but are just as passionate as each other. But most importantly, they hold different places in my heart: the Phillies represent my past and all the great things I miss about it, while the Rays represent my present and all the even greater things and people I know now (and good friends I go to games with on a regular basis, like "McLovin" and James). So, that being said, I guess I'd have to say if I had to choose, sorry Uncle Cholly, but Merlot Joe and his team of superheroes are my number ones.

Sure, they may play in a nationally-loathed but locally-loved dome with catwalks people refuse to understand in front of crowds deemed "unacceptable" by suits in a faraway city that has a fan base with a 40+ year headstart to grow to today's sizes with a media that laments their eventual removal from the area, but the people who preach to me and other converted fans that those aspects should be cause enough not to even like them just don't get it. You can't have it both ways: "you can't forsake your birth-rite" but "they don't deserve a team since they can't support them." For a team that's oldest "birth-rite" fan is only 13 years old today, it's impossible to sustain a team with only kids under 13 in the stands. So, I'm doing my part and supporting my team, and damn anyone who tries to pull that "birth-rite" crap on me. Face it, reality dictates you cannot have it both ways, so the sooner you realize that, the sooner I can possibly convert you too, if only for a day. As with me, a day is possibly all you need to change your thinking forever.

I still have never been to Raymond James Stadium and have no intention of going anytime soon, in case you're wondering.

How to Make Friends and Alienate People

2010-07-28T19:39:00.009-04:00

"Any search for a new ballpark site needs to explore all of the Tampa Bay region. This is what we repeated to Mayor Foster today. We thanked him for his gesture, and we conveyed to him again that we will consider sites in St. Petersburg and Gateway when we are considering all potential sites in Tampa Bay." - Matt Silverman, Tampa Bay Rays Team President

With that statement, Stuart Sternberg and his team of upper managers have not only said both Tropicana Field and downtown St. Petersburg are done, but they also want nothing to do with Pinellas County at this point, as well. He and his associates have managed to insult, degrade, and belittle the team's only allies for the last 13 years. Tampa has said repeatedly that they cannot and will not pay for a stadium on their side of the Bay, yet he continues to push the issue. Why, knowing all that, would be tempted to bite the hand that feeds him?

Almost three years ago, the then-Devil Rays gave us fans two things to cheer for: a new name and color scheme, as well as plans for a new, waterfront, open-air ballpark right in the heart of St. Petersburg. It was a technological marvel, promising the freedom of open-air baseball, with fresh breezes off the Bay and air-conditioned corridors to keep the temperature in check, and the protection of a weatherproof fabric retractable roof that would blend seamlessly into the skyline and prevent inevitable rainouts. It would be built on the longtime home of Spring Training in St. Pete, Al Lang Field, a place where baseball was played for three generations. Great teams from the Miracle Mets, Ozzie Smith's Cards, eight of the Yankees' championship teams, and the 1951 NY Giants' pennant winners, not counting all the teams that played on this hallowed ground as visitors over the decades. This ballpark even experienced an actual live-birth of a new team, the Gulf Coast League Devil Rays, the necessary precursor to today's American League Rays, that first took the field in 1996 on this site.

So, it has the pedigree and it has the views of downtown and the Bay, but does it have the space for something this size? The drawings presented to the public showed that, with minimal disruption to the original footprint, the dream stadium of the Rays would fit. Yes, it would require a 600+/- square foot section of the Bay to be filled in near the dogleg on Bayshore Dr SE, but it would guarantee St. Pete would be the home of Major League Baseball in Tampa Bay for a very long time. With ample parking downtown, connection to Interstate 275 via two connecting freeways, and access to the existing bus hub in downtown - with space available in the parking lots of the St. Petersburg Times for an intermodal transit hub when rail gets going in a decade or so - what could possibly be the downside to this?

Enter 1 Beach Drive, St. Petersburg, FL, 33701 aka the Bayfront Tower.

What seemed like a surefire way for the city to get the 80 acres the Trop sits on back onto the tax roles and a permanent home to the area's "boys of summer" quickly turned awry. Betting against old, rich, blue hairs with nothing to do and all the time in the world to do it is a mistake. After a year of debates, protests, campaigns for and against the proposal, and being a hot-button issue in the mayoral race, the Rays officially tabled the idea indefinitely. What seemed like the right thing for a city on the rise was now just a smoldering pile of ash. The dream stadium would stay just that: an eternal dream that would never come about.

Fast forward to June 2010, where the Rays - which had been dodging the question since their first proposal died, who insisted they're not demanding anything but "we will not be playing in Tropicana Field in 2027" - all of a sudden demanded something: a new home, and soon. But it came with a caveat: no more talk of downtown St. Pete, and probably no more talk of St. Pete as a whole. The place where the impossible dream started will no longer the be the home of the next dream. Just like a jilted lover left on his knee after his girlfriend said, "No," the Rays are doing what they can to cut ties with St. Pete, including possibly spiting them by leaving the county entirely. What once seemed like a sure thing less than 24 months prior turned into, for lack of a better word, a clusterfuck.

So, Stu has done everything right to this point: he made his case, brought forth a proposal, accepted the first defeat gracefully, plotted his next move, and pulled the trigger. Hell, it could even be argued that his refusal to accept the first (of many to come, I'm sure) compromise by the City since this all started was smart. As a good friend of mine pointed out, "It doesn't matter to me where they go as long as it's not out of state or too far out of the TB area." And despite my rage for the cavalier attitude in Stu's blatant shunning of St. Pete, he's right: we do need to do whatever it takes to keep them, as they are our team, and to let the Rays go to Portland or Charlotte because of our petty parochialism would be a PR disaster of epic proportions for the region as a whole. No one would ever want to move to such a "spiteful, ungrateful, and shameless" area; we've already gotten a black eye for - no matter if it's justified or not - our treatment of the homeless population, so we shouldn't give the national media any other reason to turn potential new residents away.

That all said, St. Pete shouldn't be sold out, either, to make the "spirit of cooperation" work. As I've said previously, we stand to lose the most should they leave our city, as we we've been the ones putting out the money to make the team viable in the area. As evidenced by their television ratings, they are definitely a team with a loyal and deep fan base, despite the accusations by know-nothings from other regions, so it's not a case of overall apathy. In fact, I think they could do just as well, or maybe even marginally better, over in downtown Tampa, though not as good as people are alluding. (Let's face it: until mass transit is up and running, people just don't like the hassle of driving and parking along with 17,000 others.)

Without some kind of guarantees in a new contract, however, St. Pete loses something more than status as a "major league city" by forfeiting the Rays to Tampa or anywhere else: they lose the revenue brought in, and in the end, that's all that should matter to the City. There's a guaranteed 81 days a year - in the middle of a summer season that's brutal for natives, let alone visitors - where people will be downtown. People are spending more time downtown since parking is harder and harder to get at the Trop, and they make more impulse purchases based on what they see when they walk by, which is what fuels areas around the county like Wrigleyville, the Inner Harbor, and the Gas Lamp Quarter.

Losing that guaranteed draw will cause irreparable harm to the overall economy of the city; the Suncoast Dome was built to get the city out of that same economic disaster in the first place. So, that's the main reason Foster needs to try and keep them in St. Pete first, but if they can't (and without a proposal by the City the team can't refuse) they need to focus on protecting our interests. Require any negotiations with other cities include a guaranteed percentage of the revenue coming to St. Pete. In return, we invest that same percentage rate into the final cost of the new stadium. We force the first cooperative effort by any of our cities since the bridges were built, which in turn could lead to more cross-Bay relationships, including mass transit, and finally bring us on-par with other metros across the country. Doing so guarantees St. Pete much-needed revenue for as long as the stadium stands, the Rays get their dream stadium in any city they want, and the new home of the Rays is still within 60 minutes of the loyal fan base it has painstakingly created over the past 13 years.

I'll be the first to admit it: I'm spoiled. I have baseball in my backyard and don't have to sacrifice much to be there; sadly, not everyone's that lucky. However, this is a very spread-out area, so getting a stadium near the vast majority of the population - like it is in cities like Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Los Angeles - is near impossible. To make it all work, we all need to sacrifice something we cherish. For me, it's the stubbornness of letting them leave my grasp and following them wherever they end up. For St. Pete, it's the civic pride and bragging rights they bring. For people more than 15 miles from the stadium, it's the idea that "if it's not 5 minutes away, it's too far," and tossing that out the window.

We cannot, however, sacrifice everything for something, and when being put in an unreasonable position of "bad guy" solely for the "greater good" without any chance to ask for anything in return is unacceptable. If you'd like to be a good negotiator, Stu, next time St. Pete comes to the table with a proposal, understand the City will inevitably lose massive amounts of cash based on your move and offer them a bone in return for their cooperation. You'd be surprised how far you can go with a little empathy.

Where's Our All-Star Game, Bud?!?

2010-07-13T00:53:00.006-04:00

Tonight - Tuesday, June 13, 2010 - the 81st Major League Baseball All-Star Game will take place at Angels Stadium in Anaheim. It's considered to be the showcase of baseball's most-talented players. Almost every Hall-of-Famer has played here in the national spotlight of the Midsummer Classic. It brings to the city - and the team - that hosts it the pomp and circumstance that goes along with it. And money - lots of money. Tourists from across the country, people who not only love their teams, but baseball as an institution more so, come to that city for two nights to soak in all that is the All-Star Game.

Now, it's St. Pete's - and Florida's - turn to share in this tradition.

I know what you're thinking: "Not until they build a new stadium should one be awarded." And I'll call you out right now and say you're naïve and wrong, and here's why:

Never has there been an All-Star Game held in the Sunshine State, and once the Diamondbacks host the game next year - unless the protesters get their way - the Marlins and the Rays will be the only two teams never to have hosted one (the Nationals hosted one while still in Montreal, but otherwise, every other team has hosted one in their current city). Right there, you put two teams that are constantly marked in the news as "poor attendance teams" at a monetary disadvantage for both the year they'd have it and subsequent years preceding and following. They don't have the right to say "Home of the xxxx All-Star Game" on their door, while the other teams can - and do. The "Luxury Tax" encourages parity in the system, but ignoring a state of 19 million - and two metros with a combined population of 9.5 million - in choosing a site for your showcase game goes a long way to calling that tax a farce.

"Why the Rays over the Marlins, then? The Marlins have more people in their metro, as well as two World Series rings." Simple: it rains in the summer in Florida. Compared with its counterpart in Miami Gardens, Tropicana Field is a 43,000-seat (with the tarps off) icebox, complete with 72˚ temperatures, a non-existent breeze, and nary a cloud in the sky. There is zero chance for a rain delay in the dome, and - as shown during the 2008 World Series - St. Pete knows how to throw a party. This time, they'd have more time to prepare to make it spectacular. That's the difference between prepping for a World Series and ASG: time. With a World Series, you have 2-3 weeks top to get the items that cost and can't be returned if you don't make it, whereas you have 3-4 years to prep for an ASG that you know is coming for certain. St. Pete shined during the World Series, so with enough time, it'll blow that away as the biggest event ever in the city.

"But domes aren't good for baseball; plus having the catwalks will make the Home Run Derby a 'disgrace'." There have been four fixed-roof stadiums to host the ASG: Houston's Astrodome (thrice), Seattle's Kingdome, the Twin Cities' Metrodome, and Montreal's Stade Olympique. Another five additional outdoor stadiums have held the festivities on what was considered to be a poorer-grade turf than the Trop has today: Cincinnati's Riverfront Stadium (twice), Philly's Veterans Stadium (twice), Pittsburgh's Three Rivers Stadium (twice), Toronto's SkyDome, and Washington's RFK Stadium (during the Senators/Rangers era), the last one as late as 1996 at the Vet. In all, that works out to 14 games (17.28%) played on similar conditions to the Trop, and a whopping 50% of the games played from 1968-1996 (first and last years on turf) were played indoors and on the fake stuff. Granted, none of them have the catwalk issue, but the point remains the Trop wouldn't be the first fixed-dome to host, as that precedent was set back in 1968, and it wouldn't be the first - or theoretically the last - with an artificial surface to host, either (1968-70, three years in a row did, and the SkyDome - now the Rogers Centre - is not planning on planting the natural stuff anytime soon, seeing as they just has a major upgrade on their AstroTurf this year). In fact, it could be a fitting sendoff to the era of domes by allowing the Trop to have the honors sooner, seeing as the lifespan has been significantly shortened recently.

And on the catwalk issue, a new precedent could, in fact, be set for the Home Run Derby. If they felt those concentric rings were "disgraceful", move the Derby to Al Lang Field. That's right: a small Minor League-sized park overlooking Tampa Bay could be the center of the baseball universe for one night, just as it had been for those 94 years of Spring Training, another homage to the past. Take some of the bleachers from the Grand Prix of St. Pete and put them as temporary seating along the outfield wall, and you've just turned the small ballpark by the Bay into the ideal spot to smash home runs all night.

"Why not just wait until a new stadium is built?" If Bud had his way, it'd have been opening next year already...somewhere else. However, our region is currently in an upheaval over whether Tampa or St. Pete - or Charlotte - should get the Rays, so based on the rate new stadiums are granted the privilege of hosting an ASG, we'd be waiting 15-20 years before we were even considered. Quite frankly, the Rays don't have that long. The Marlins have a new stadium being built on Calle Ocho, so they're not going anywhere anytime soon. The Rays, on the other hand, have a contract that can easily be bought out keeping them here. We need something that will bring this community around them once and for all, and the ASG will do that. At the rate things are going, we can't afford to wait.

So, Mr. Bud Selig, Commissioner of Major League Baseball, I know you'll never read this, but you need to know that St. Pete and Tampa Bay, for all we have done for baseball over the past 100 years, want, need, and deserve the All-Star Game in Tropicana Field. To continue to give it to the "haves" in baseball is a disgrace, while the "have-nots" have to fight to even keep our teams around. So we don't have the Taj Mahal of baseball; that honor belongs to the Bronx. We also don't have the ancient stomping grounds of legends past; those are in Boston and Chicago. Nor do we have the shiniest and newest of stadiums; in fact, we're the 9th-oldest. However, we have a place guaranteed to have perfect weather, a great atmosphere, a sellout crowd, and enough positive highlights to make it a game to remember. Enough with playing politics and let us just have the game that - for all the right reasons - belongs in the heart and birthplace of Spring Training, St. Petersburg, Florida.

A House Divided...

2010-07-05T15:17:00.006-04:00

In 1990, a decades-old dream was finally realized. It started with a visionary named Albert Lang, who, way back in 1914, decided he wanted something to help bolster the tourism and appeal of the bayside hamlet of which he was the visionary mayor. Then, sixty years later, the leaders of the now-burgeoning city realized St. Petersburg's best days were behind them: crime was rampant in the southern and downtown parts of the city, and the northern reaches were relegated to nothing more than over-glorified retirement communities. The tax base was way down for even the most basic of emergency services, thereby straining the coffers to the point of breaking. "White Flight" was just as prevalent here as it was in the Rust Belt. Something needed to be done, and they had an epiphany: they needed to use the one thing that still brought the people back every spring and make it a more permanent fixture, bringing people here to spend their money in the dead of summer so they can realize it's not a bad place to live and bring their money with them full-time.

Thus, the Florida Suncoast Dome was born. Of course, like Rome, it wasn't built in a day - or a decade for that matter. But eventually, after much fighting regionally between St. Petersburg and its bigger sister across the bay, Tampa, and in-fighting within St. Pete's city limits itself, a site - and a design - was finally chosen. Fast forward back to 1990, and the builders, city leaders, and design critics all call the lopsided dome with concentric, self-supporting rings holding its roof aloft "the stadium for the 21st Century." It's the jewel of St. Petersburg - even though the then-commissioner of Major League Baseball told the city that just because they build it, they won't necessarily come - and a state-of-the-art masterpiece in all of its air-conditioned glory.

Then, Camden Yards is built....

Now, the stadium that was built only two short years prior - the year in which the dome (now renamed the Thunderdome) is inhabited by both the NHL's Lightning and AFL's Storm - is now "functionally obsolete" for the original purpose it was built, a sport that hadn't even been awarded to the area yet and won't be for another four years. Everyone "in the know" now wants their very own Camden Yards in their downtowns; apparently, what works in one city is a goldmine everywhere, or so the thinking goes.

So, with that in mind, the 9th-newest stadium in Major League Baseball when the Rays first took the field is today the 9th-oldest (soon to become the 8th-oldest in 2012 with the opening of the Marlins' new house in Little Havana). Tropicana Field, as it's now called, is a relic long before its time. By declaring his intentions on June 21, Stu Sternberg has said, without a shadow of a doubt, that the Trop is done and needs to be replaced. And, he's not mincing words, either:

“Baseball in the Tampa Bay area does not belong to Stu Sternberg, just as it doesn’t belong to St. Petersburg or Tampa, Pinellas or Hillsborough. It is a regional asset. It belongs to our fans throughout the region. For this asset to be preserved, a comprehensive process to explore a new ballpark must begin."

So, as you can see, he's trying to force "regional cooperation" in determining the next site of the Rays base of operations. Personally, I'd love to see that myself, because for far too long, Tampa and St. Pete have acted like fierce rivals in some sort of chess match for total domination of the region. However, as a St. Petersburger, I can understand why residents on this side of the water feel constantly at-war with their neighbor to the northeast.

We are not like other "twin cities" in the country, namely Minneapolis/St. Paul and Dallas/Fort Worth. In those regions, they work together more than just philosophically; they share tax revenue from the areas' attractions - including their sports teams - along with spending money equally for regional services. Even now, here in Tampa Bay regional transit is beginning to take shape...with each county paying its own way, but only if the citizens of those counties vote to approve it at all in their borders. We do not cooperate like the Twin Cities or the Metroplex because we prefer to act independent - and bitch about it later when we can't afford luxuries we became accustomed to anymore.

When St. Petersburg built the Suncoast Dome 20 years ago, it was with St. Pete and Pinellas County money. Tampa brought nothing to the table, nor did Hillsborough, Manatee, Pasco, or any other county government for that matter. Basically put: if St. Pete loses the Rays, we lose not only a team or a piece of our civic pride, we also lose the money brought to this city by them each and every year since we were the only ones to bear the financial burden. This city and county had to go it alone, and sadly, this is how pretty much any public works project goes around here, and until that mentality changes, I can completely appreciate why the city of St. Pete refuses to listen to a suit from New York tell them how to "cooperate".

However, that leaves only three options to solving this mess, and none involve the lame - and tired - argument of "enforcing the contract through 2027 via legal proceedings"; let's face it: if the Seattle SuperSonics, original Cleveland Browns, and Baltimore Colts can all get out of their contracts relatively unscathed, so too can the Rays:

St. Petersburg must come to the table with a kickass proposal to be located in the Trop's current parking lot - something that will satiate Stu's wanderlust - while understanding we're going to have to probably front about 67% of the costs; not doing this will cause the city to lose a massively substantial tax base and, by extension, lose even more city services,
Tampa and St. Petersburg - along with all the surrounding counties, as well as others in the demographic area (Polk, Hernando, Sarasota, Citrus, Sumter, Hardee, and Desoto) - need to finally put "regional differences" aside, realize we need each other to survive in the 21st Century against the Charlottes, Austins, and Portlands of the country, and start working on a regional sales tax to pay for public works projects that affect more than 60% of the metro's population base, such as public transit, tourism advertising, and (yes) stadiums, or
Pack Evan Longoria's bags for him to move with the team to Norfolk/Virginia Beach, San Antonio, or Vancouver (What? Canada's hungry for another team!).

That all said, we're really not left with many choices. As much as Stu Sternberg is being vilified by the region (myself included) for telling us how to run our lives, his concise assessment may actually be something that will help us all much sooner than anyone expected. He said something that needed to be said for a long time, but no one has the muscle - or balls - to say it until now: we're a broken region with our petty parochialism. It's our own fault, though, but now's our chance to shine and make up for the shortsightedness of our parents. What was seen as a good idea with "home-rule" in the '50s is holding us back from becoming the next great region today.

However, tomorrow's another day, and hopefully we'll have come a long way by then. Hell, at least our grandparents had enough foresight to fly the world's first commercial "airline", as well as build the then-world's longest bridge, all in attempt for cross-bay cooperation. Maybe we can take a lesson from them instead and put it to use in 2010....

Breaking Up is Hard to Do

2010-04-04T09:55:00.001-04:00

So, another baseball season starts tonight. Gone are the dark days - between the Super Bowl and Opening Day - of being forced to watch random basketball games on TNT and ABC to pass the time (I, personally love hockey, so I will not call it, as John Saunders - a Canadian and avid hockey fan himself, I might add - from ESPN's Sports Reporters recently mused,

"Hockey will always be sports' ugly step-sister. Even those who don't really care seem to go out of their way to dislike the game."

Though, sadly, I can see his point most other Americans' attitudes of indifference toward it.) and watching the same exact dunk or 3-point shot on SportsCenter every waking moment. The smell of grass, hot dogs, and Cracker Jacks have been hot and heavy in the air for a few weeks now with spring training steadily progressing in Florida and Arizona. And starting tonight, the Boys of Summer will return to their homes, be them ancient temples to the Baseball Gods, modern works of art, hyper-expensive replicas of their former selves, or impressive domes people love to hate, and we will be watching. But, do the overblown economics really dictate the game as much the press - and the fans of the smaller-market teams - lead you to believe? Have the fortunes of all 30 teams really been decided before the games even count? If you listen to what Bud Selig tells you, yeah, and something needs to be done about it.

With the first pitch of the season being thrown in Boston against (who else?) dem Yanks, the chatter around the League right now is creating something of an obscure idea here in North America, but common in the rest of the world in their football leagues: rotating leagues. Now, all four North American major sports leagues (as well as lesser ones, like Major League Soccer and the Arena Football League) keep a static form of divisions; that is, they stay in the same league and division until the powers-that-be decide - for any myriad of reasons, ranging from geographical considerations to scheduling balance - to make a change. Over in Eurasia, however, what league you are playing in in any given year depends on how well or poorly you did the year prior. If you were the champion of Division II last year, you can move to Division I to try and see if you can win that one, too. If you sucked in Div. I after moving up, well, be thankful your team isn't being sent to Div. III instead.

Though MLB's proposal isn't as radical (no, teams like the Mets won't be sent to the Minors, though if they were, they'd probably be better off going straight to the Single-A Sally League), it would allow teams that are in "rebuilding years" - excluding the Mets - to move to a higher-grossing division to get more revenue share for said rebuilding by swapping with teams that are constantly competing against powerhouses and falling just short. The best example of this would be putting the Oakland A's in the AL "East" and letting the Tampa Bay Rays play in the AL "West" so they both get what they want: the A's would get more money for better players and a healthier future, while the Rays would have a chance at a division title without relying on the bad luck of other teams to make it happen (let's face it: the Rays were phenomenal in 2008, but the Yanks were just plain bad, which allowed the Rays to exploit that and make it to the Promised Land).

Proponents say, since a salary cap isn't in the cards anytime in the near future, this is the closest to parity we can get in baseball right now. I'm in the camp with the opponents, however. I believe constantly moving teams around year-to-year not only wreaks havoc on the schedule, but also fragments rivalries, which is truly what puts people in the stands. It also puts an undue burden on the team, causing them to under-perform. No longer is it a simple jog up the East Coast to play the other teams in the division; you're now flying out west for 36 games a year, playing with jet-lag 24 games more than the norm. Anyone who has crossed the country once had a hard enough time acclimating to the change once; imagine your own performance doing that up to 12 times in a 5 month period. No one should have to work under those types of conditions, even athletes.

A much better - and more controversial - solution would be to break up the two toughest teams in baseball, who are locked in eternal grudge match while the rest of the division suffers. Yes, I am talking about the AL East's Yanks and Red Sox. Yes, geographically, they are in the correct division, but by virtue of their bottomless wallets, they have pretty much owned the AL East and, by virtue of 2nd place in the division, the AL Wild Card for all but 7 of the 15 years the current format has been in play (1997 Orioles and 2008 Rays each won the division, and 1996 O's, 2000 Mariners, 2001 A's, 2002 Angels, and 2006 Tigers each won the WC). That means, more than half the time, both the Yankees and Red Sox will both be in the playoffs while the rest of the teams are on the sidelines.

The current system penalizes mid-market teams. Not every team has a ravenous fan base like New York and Boston, and the longer they're allowed to control the only two spots into the playoffs, the more it hurts the other teams by lost revenue streams in October and smaller fan bases at the perception of constant mediocrity (if you miss the playoffs, you suck, right?). Leaving those two to play each other for the same playoff spots year-in and year-out will soon do more damage to baseball than steroids ever could.

So, what we will do is have the Yankees and Mets swap leagues, with them going to the NL East and AL East, respectively. Right there, the parity is split between the two sides and breaks up the constant monopoly of the AL East lead positions. For those that say that would just monopolize the NL East (with 4-time division champ and 2-time pennant winner Philadelphia quickly becoming a dynasty) causing the same issue, have Philly and Pittsburgh swap, too. Yeah, it's not geographically correct, but that can be solved later with the addition of two more teams (see my previous post on the subject of expansion).

There, problem solved, and no need for inconsistency year-to-year. Why should other teams be penalized if the core problem is between two behemoths in a top-heavy division? Split those two up, and smaller-market teams will start winning thereby having more people coming to their games, helping MLB as a whole. But logic won't happen in Major League Baseball so long as Bud's still in charge. However, people have surprised me before, but I'm not holding my breath. Until the tides change, the Rays will just have to continue to win on low budgets, I guess.

Please Stand By....

2010-03-08T11:27:00.003-05:00

(Editor's Note: Hi to my minions out there! As you can see, I've been on a bit of a hiatus as of late, but fret not! I'm going to get back out here and write some more soon, so keep your eyes peeled, because the newest blog will both entertain and enlighten. More to come soon, but in the meantime, please enjoy this reposting of one of my more interesting blogs from my MySpace days. See you soon!)

(Original posting date: September 12, 2006, edited only for spelling)

Well, as you probably know, I haven't written anything in a while, so I did some thinking, because I want to make everything I say to count; I've spoken the truth before, and I'm not going to stop just to appease a restless audience. I've gone through many different factors in my mind to come up with this, so I hope this means 25% as much as it does to me. So, without further ado...

First of all, as most of you are aware, I took a (almost) spur-of-the-moment road trip to the Northeast a couple weekends ago, and I have to say, with the exception of not visiting two people (and they know who they are, and one wasn't a social call), I think the trip was a success. Philly will just have to be the next blog (though it would fit chronologically). This one seems appropriate for the occasion.

As everyone knows, yesterday was the 5th Anniversary of our nation losing it's last shred of innocence, and while this seems 24 hours late, think about this; today marks the 5th Anniversary we became a military state, a nation, not of freedom, but of lock downs and shoe searches. From the day of the first commercial flight (which happened right here, from St. Pete to Tampa, in 1912, BTW) to 9/11/01 (before 9:30AM, of course), with the exceptions of firearms and swords, we could bring practically anything on a plane. We could, with permission, go and talk to the pilot mid-flight and have our children sit on their laps, and when they were done, the pilot or co-pilot would give them "wings"...I still have mine. And I read an interesting article in the tbt* today (the Tampa Bay Times, for people who don't know what it is, and for my Philly friends, it's like our version of the Daily News, but free) about how since we've lost our ability to see our loved ones off, the airport is no longer the romantic, magical place it once was. Instead of kissing your lover good-bye and watch them disappear down the tunnel, or watching your children try to see Daddy one more time before he disappears for his business trip, it's a quick "See ya," at the curb, basically the passion of a one-night stand. You know their leaving, but not for another 3-4 hours, so you wait anxiously to hear they're boarding, but where are you? Not within 100' of them, minimum. And what about returns? No more rushing to greet them from the plane, with all the love and sense of security that they've landed in one piece. It's all gone now, all because we've turned into the equivalent of a democratic Nazi regime.

Because I said that, I could probably now be profiled as a terrorist, and since "they" now suspect me, I'm being wire-tapped and having all my e-mails and my hard drive searched right now. They'll find the porn sites I've visited, the e-mails I've sent to friends about chain jokes I've gotten, and my MySpace page depicting buildings in Philly. Does that make me a prime target because I'm a pedophile conspirator planning to attack Liberty Place? No, because I'm a white guy named Dietrich. The government is "profiling" (a pretty word for being racist) against anyone named Muhammed, Abullah, and Natal, anyone who sounds like their from the Middle East (except Israel, because we love them for killing the "Muslim targets" for us), or preaches to Allah (which, fellow Christians, is the same god as our God; remember, Abraham beget Issac (Jewish) and Ishmael (Muslim)...crazy how that works, huh?); the people of this great nation gave the government the power to do that by allowing our Congress to pass the "Patriot Act". The people did similar things back in 1933 by electing the Nazi party candidate for Chancellor (soon after Fürher) Adolf Hitler and allowing Lenin and the Boshlevicks to take over Imperial Russia in 1917, which eventually lead to the Great Purge by Stalin in the late 40's. History repeats itself, and we see that here. Pretty soon, blacks in our country won't have a thing to worry about because we'll be trying to enslave people of Arab ancestry because, "they all look like Muslims."

Has this day lost it's meaning? I mean, sure, it only happened 5 years ago and people definitely remember what happened, but what, if anything, have we learned? There was a chain bulletin (most likely sent out by someone who isn't old enough to care about what happened) last week saying every one should "skipp [sic] school because we shouldn't be here when people died. It should be a national holiday." I disagree. Memorial Day was a holiday set up by the Federal government back in the 20's to remember all the people who died serving this country, esp. the Great War (there wasn't WWII yet to warrant a moniker), since it just happened less than a decade before. Now, do we remember our fallen heroes more than a speech by our sitting prez before we either go down the shore/go the beach (pick your vernacular) or shop till we drop with all the sales? Obviously, that's not what the senator who proposed that holiday had in mind, and I'm sure rolls over in his grave every year. And the same goes for the Pilgrims in Plymouth. Do you honestly think they prayed, "Let us thank God for this bountiful feast, and let's thank Him for the amazing deals happening tomorrow down at The Wigwam. Now, I can get that wonderful bonnet for Sarah Goodwife for Christmas. Amen."? Hell no, and this is exactly what would happen if we make 9/11 (aka "Patriot Day" on the calendar I have at work) a Federal, State, or even a local holiday. Then 2,982 people died in vain, and how would you explain that to your kids when they ask, "Why do we celebrate this holiday, Mom?"

Then, I watched "Mr Smith Goes To Washington" for about the 4th time (but the first in a very long time...one of the best movies ever, I highly recommend EVERYONE see it at least once) today and it made me remember that the little guy can stand up and be heard in government. Of course, it takes a lot of heart and courage to do so, but that's the only way meaningful things are accomplished. It also reminded me of something that has been lost lately: the freedom of speech. Jokingly saying the word "bomb" or causally saying "I'm going to kill you," or even saying something that may offend someone like "handyman" instead of "handyperson" (what about women?) or "white" instead of "Caucasian" (what about albinos?) could have "harassment" charges filed against you. We used to be able to bad mouth the powers-at-large, and they would laugh it off. Now, if you say something bad about our prez, like calling him a "low-life douchebag who should be recalled" or a "lying emperor who has overstepped his bounds" could possibly lead to "terrorist" charges. Our Constitution guarantees freedom of speech and press (I won't start on them, I promise), but all we're getting is watered-down reasons to have our rights trampled on. The 4th Amendment protects us from all the searches at airports and the 5th-8th Amendments protect people who look or sound Islamic from being prosecuted like terrorists when they more than likely aren't (a study in Newsday showed that 87% of all Muslims in the world believed the terrorists should be kicked out of the Mosques) without due process. While some may say, "they killed innocent Americans without due process," I counter and say that our laws make us who we are, and if we decide to impede on them just because they're "inconvenient" at the time, it makes us no better than a fascist state like Mussolini's Italy or Stalin's communist Russia. We take a huge step back in human rights while the world moves forward, just because a handful of extremists are identified with an entire culture. It's the 1920's all over again, and if we continue, it'll be like the 1820's, just with technology. People, come to your senses; sto being sheep and think for yourself what is happening before we blindly elect another Hitler to power.

Man, I have so much more to say, but it's getting late, and I think I've covered the key points. I'm just as angered and hurt about what happened 5 years ago yesterday, and I know those 19 hijackers didn't meet Allah/God like they planned, but we shouldn't be on a witch hunt. Let's spend these days remembering our lost family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors, not with blood, but with peace. We can't make this world a better place unless we lead by example and why not start today?

He who saves one life, saves the world entire.
- old Jewish proverb

You Only Live Twice: The Update

2009-10-30T09:03:00.003-04:00

Hi gang! I'll keep this short and sweet as it's merely an update to my last post on the history and future of Al Lang Field. Well, I promised once I got a reply from the other St. Pete mayoral candidate, Kathleen Ford, I'd post it. So, without further ado, her reply, two weeks later, verbatim:

Hi, Jim,
I think the current mayor is attempting to enter into an agreement for the use of Al Lang Field. There was a visioning workshop last winter where residents discussed Al Lang Field's future potential uses. No plan has been passed. As you know, the City has a rich history of spring training baseball. There is nothing in our current city charter that protects Al Lang Field (I helped draft such an amendment-see www.stpetepoww.com). I think the uses of our public waterfront should be decided by the citizens. Our beautiful waterfront is what sets us apart from most cities in Florida!
Kathleen

And there you have it. Read from it how you will, because it's definitely, in my opinion, open for interpretation.

Oh, and in case you're not paying attention...GO PHILS!!!

You Only Live Twice?

2009-10-26T20:17:00.012-04:00

I was going to write my next blog on the virtues of high-speed rail and why it will be the best thing for Florida since the advent of air conditioning, but while trying to think about how not to bore you with endless prose, I came across something that broke my heart: according to Ballpark Digest, Al Lang Field is now considered the most endangered ballpark in the country. What does that mean? It means the piece of property credited with starting the modern incarnation of Spring Training will, unless something is done quickly, become nothing more than another park.

Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fan of the St. Petersburg waterfront. I believe the idea of leaving the waterfront parkland in perpetuity took tremendous foresight by the city's founders, especially in a time when the only true sign of a "major city" was factories billowing with smoke and water browner than mud. "It's a minor inconvenience to becoming a modern city," was the common contemporary thinking, and not to kowtow to that was incredible. Mayor Al Lang, for whom the current stadium is named, thought that, instead of trying to become an industrial powerhouse, get the teams of the northern metropolises to come to him. He then took a piece of that parkland and built a stadium on what is the parking lot of the current stadium and built Waterfront Park to replace his first brainchild, Coffee Pot Park, opened just 10 years earlier.

Everyone from Babe Ruth to Joe DiMaggio, and Stan Musial to Ozzie Smith, all played on this hallowed ground every March. A total of seven teams called this price of property bounded by 1st St S, 1st Ave SE, Bayshore Dr SE, and 4th Ave SE, home over the course of 86 years. With the left foul line a mere 100 feet from Tampa Bay and Albert Whitted Airport's 7/25 runway about 1000 feet from the outfield wall, its scenery is easily number one in the Grapefruit League, and quite possibly one of the best in the country. While there is no outfield seating (like most Spring Training ballparks in the Sunshine State), the berms along the foul lines are very comfortable and oriented perfectly fine for viewing baseball. But alas, at the close of Rays Spring Training in 2008, the bats have fallen silent.

There are many theories as to why it sits idle today, but what everyone can agree on one thing: the Rays left for Port Charlotte in March of this year for a new spring home. My theory is this: yes, they wanted a new pro stadium on the site, and to me, it seems like the natural progression from Minor League host city to Major League Player. However, a majority of the city thought differently, and the Rays are now looking elsewhere - be it in Tropicana Field's parking lot or Tampa - so the shell of the former icon sits mothballed, hoping to one day have a game played. So, it still sits empty, but with all the amenities I've explained, why would that be? It's because the seating area itself is outdated and not conducive to attracting another homeless team (like the Cubs, who just told Mesa, AZ, to give them a new home ASAP, or they're leaving HoHoKam Park at the end of next Spring Training. Hey, Mayor Baker, you reading this?!?), despite everything going for it. No matter how beautiful the locale, no one wants to play in a dump.

The best thing the city can do is the following: tear down Al Lang Field as it is today. Turn the grandstand to where the outfield is today and orient home plate to face due north; that, right there, will get the sun out of the batter's eyes, plus give everyone in the seats the most spectacular downtown skyline view of almost any ballpark (what park do you know is a block from the city's tallest buildings?). Build outfield seating, even if it's just a berm with a boardwalk that raps around the entire structure, thus expanding seating. Recruit local restaurants to provide the concessions, giving the fare a distinctively St. Pete feel. Finally, bring Minor League Baseball back. While the biggest draw will be March and Spring Training, people like me who love baseball, while still going to Rays games religiously, would want to take in a Saturday night ballgame on a day when the Rays are out of town; they could easily work out a schedule that wouldn't conflict too much between the two organizations, even if they are separate teams. Just don't let it disappear.

The current mayoral race here in St. Petersburg has a lot riding on it. The two candidates are differing on many key issues, from policing to how to handle a new stadium for the Rays. However, what has never been brought up in the debates is how they will handle Al Lang Field. I recently e-mailed both candidates for mayor and asked what they intend to do with sacred ground. Bill Foster plans to have an "Asian Major League" team train here alongside the MLB (which makes sense since the Grapefruit League now only has 15 members with the departure of the Reds for Goodyear, AZ, this coming year), and having Canadian and European teams fill the rest of the year. As he told me in an e-mail from 10/15:

"I am already working on this, and have great interest from a major league team from Korea, and the Canadian National team is already on board. Once Korea comes on board, a team from Japan can't be too far behind."

This could be a promising - and interesting - idea. My only question is how many people will actually come to Florida from Korea in March, and how many Canadians will actually come down in the heat of August? Getting anyone that's never heard of St. Pete to come is always a plus, but how realistic is that of an expectation? I'm open to new ideas, but I think we should get the guaranteed money in first before expanding globally. Definitely intriguing, though.

I have yet to hear back from Kathleen Ford's camp. The e-mail to both was sent out on 10/15. If she responds I'll update this post accordingly, but as of this moment, I have to take this as she is too focused on forcing the Rays into keeping the Trop until 2027 instead of worrying about things in her own backyard that can be solved today. I'm open to a future without Al Lang Field, the ballpark, if a reasonable alternative is presented. However, another open-space park is not one of them.

(10/30 UPDATE: She finally responded! See the info HERE!!!)

The loss of an icon, or a rebirth? That all depends on who you ask or what happens in the near future. Even if you don't like baseball, you need to be able to respect the land for what it has come to represent: the beginning of a springtime ritual that has thousands migrate south for 30 days of pleasure. While times have changed, Spring Training has not, and it's all based on the formula perfected on this plot of land by the small sleepy town of St. Pete. Just as St. Pete has grown into the 4th-largest city in Florida, has it truly outgrown its roots that much? I don't believe so, but I hope the the rest of the city feels the same way. Otherwise, another piece of our history will be reduced to a lawn.

Expansion of an Institution

2009-09-09T12:00:00.001-04:00

I'm ending my self-imposed moratorium on discussing baseball. It's a sport I love, as Kevin may argue, to a fault. It's one of the things I'm truly optimistic about in life and I can spend hours talking about it. It's one of the common denominators we all, as Americans, can relate to. Whether we love it or loathe it, we all respect it as America's Pastime. Yeah, football is more ingrained into the American psyche now, but that's just dumbed-down rugby. Basketball has Mayan and African origins, and hockey is all thanks to the Great White North. Baseball, whether or not related to cricket in its purest form, is, like mom and apple pie, Americana in its essence.

The love of the game is what makes Major League Baseball the second-most profitable sports league in the world (behind the NFL). Japan has its own Major Leagues, as well as most of Southeast Asia and some European nations. It's a simple game, really: hit the ball, run to the bases, make it home without getting caught. It's how it's done, as well as the length of the season, that adds to the intrigue. The home run chases, the pitchers' duels, the trades: they all make a season interesting. Fans live and die with one of the 30 teams you remain loyal to season after season, as if they were some sects of a cult religion. You learn to hate the warring factions, even if you're not sure why there's animosity, simply because your father, and his father, and his father all did before you. You carry a torch for your mortal gods, no matter how well or how poorly they do. No other sport allows one team to have a wretched day and still be able to join the immortals of October, especially not the anointed football. "Baseball", as the Tampa Bay Rays' marketing department has been saying all year, "is beautiful."

This is why I feel now is the time for expansion into both underserved and unserved markets. The love is still there and people still want to see the boys of summer become our gods of the cult. Minor League Baseball is alive and well in this country, though most of the players aren't under the pretense they will ever make it to the Bigs. Some major metropolitan areas are more than 200 miles from their closest MLB team, and while their MiLB players are grateful to play there, they, as well as the citizenry of those "minor cities", would love to host the real deal. They would love the opportunity to have the Commissioner's Trophy parade down their Main Street - or at least appear for photo ops in City Hall.

St. Pete is the most recent to experience this. Long considered the Birthplace of Spring Training, St. Petersburg joined the "major cities" in 1998 by finally filling the Thunderdome with its own baseball team. It took 11 seasons, but the Rays finally had its first winning season, playoff berth, and World Series appearance - all at once. And while the season didn't include a ticker-tape parade down Bayshore Dr, the Commissioner's Trophy did finally set foot on this holy city, the mecca of modern baseball, spring home to the immortals - Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Musial, Ozzie Smith, Stengel, among countless others that faced them in the holiest of shrines, Al Lang Field. It took 92 years from the time Mayor Al Lang convinced the Phillies and Browns to come to his city in March until his ultimate dream was realized of a World Series being played there, but it truly was worth the wait.

It's time for others to feel that euphoria of each pitch, the joy of each homer, and the overall feeling of ecstasy of a Major League Baseball season. And with that, I give you my possible candidates for expansion. Keep in mind that, due to the current scheduling structure of the Majors, only even numbers can join at once, or else the National and American leagues would need to play each other all the time, and personally, I like the fact they're separated, save three weeks-a-year. Without further ado, here are the candidates for a new franchise and why - welcome to the Majors, everyone:

1.) Hampton Roads - With the exclusion of Las Vegas (which no pro sports team will touch until they come to an agreement over sports betting), this region is the largest metropolis without any of the Major Sports (MLB, NFL, NBA, and NHL). They're chomping at the bit for anything to come their way; in fact, they almost obtained the then-Montreal Expos with the hopes of an expansion to their minor league park would seal the deal. Unfortunately, it didn't, and that team is now the Washington Nationals, a mere 208 miles one-way away. With a worthy investor and a hungry populous, this turns into a gold mine for anyone willing to take a chance.

2.) Portland, OR - This city is the model of urban planning. Its metro system is constantly ranked toward the top of lists year after year and its environmentally-conscious government make this one hell of a desirable locale. It has only one "Big 4" team: the NBA's Trailblazers. The people love them intensely and that rabid fandom would carry over to baseball, making it more than profitable in every sense.

3.) Vancouver, BC - "But Jimbo, didn't MLB just pull half the Canadian teams back to the US?" Yes, but Montreal's biggest flaw was its white elephant, the Olympic Stadium. That place costs more to operate in, even paid-off, than almost every other stadium in MLB. This is why even the CFL pulled the Allouettes out and built them a new stadium. Vancouver, on the other hand, is just as large of a metro, with a large percentage of their citizens being Mariners, not Blue Jays, fans. With over 2 million in the metro area and being the only other city in Canada with professional baseball (minor league Class-A Canadians), this is a perfect fit into the Majors.

4.) Charlotte, Raleigh, or Durham, NC - North Carolina is home to the other three of the Big 4: NFL's Panthers, NHL's Hurricanes, and NBA's Bobcats. North Carolina is also home to nine minor league teams of all three skill sets, and one of the most famous teams in the Minors, the Durham Bulls. The pedigree is there, but are the people of North Carolina ready for baseball? I think so, and it would not be a bad investment to think likewise.

5.) Wilmington, DE - Why would I suggest such a small town, one of only 75,000? It's the same distance from Philadelphia as the Dodgers/Angels, Orioles/Nationals, and Giants/Athletics are from each other. Philadelphia is the largest metro without two teams in at least one sport, and as the Athletics were the American League team in Philly from the time they helped charter the AL in 1901 (the team existed in some form since 1876, however) until 1954 when they went to Kansas City, and the fact the Phillies have almost sold-out every game over the past few seasons, they proved they can handle two teams. Putting it in Wilmington allows enough distance for the fan bases to naturally grow in opposite directions: the southern regions attracted to Wilmington and the northern regions attracted to Philly. The AL/NL rivalry could begin again. The Blue Rocks' Frawley Stadium has enough space to expand into a 40,000 seat field, and with its close proximity to downtown Wilmington and I-95, it's a sure-fire bet they will be profitable.

Considering the most likely scenario is going to involve only two teams, bringing the total to 32 - which works well for the NFL - and the most likely candidates would be one new metro (the largest with the least competition from other leagues, Hampton Roads) and a proven area in search of a second team (the Delaware Valley), the new divisions would keep old rivalries in tact as much as possible while allowing for the new additions. Unlike the "four teams, four divisions" system the NFL uses, that won't work in MLB's case to keep said rivalries and the playoff format in tact:

National League East: Philadelphia, New York (NL), Atlanta, Florida (soon Miami), Washington, Pittsburgh
National League Central: Chicago (NL), Milwaukee, St. Louis, Cincinnati, Houston
National League West: Los Angeles, San Francisco, San Diego, Colorado, Arizona
American League East: New York (AL), Boston, Toronto, Wilmington, Hampton Roads, Baltimore
American League Central: Chicago (AL), Minnesota, Cleveland, Detroit, Tampa Bay
American League West: Seattle, Anaheim, Texas, Oakland, Kansas City

The playoff format would need to be changed slightly, but it would result in only an extra, at most, 3 days of rest for the division winners. With the sudden explosion of extra teams, it would be time to expand to two wild-card slots instead of today's one. This allows more teams to make it to the postseason with a still significantly less percentage-wise playoff ratio when compared to the other leagues. However, the two wild-cards would face each other in a best-of-three, with the winner playing the next team by the same rules as today (#1 seed, except if that team is in the same division).

Now, I'm sure I'll get pushback for my choices of cities that would make it, the subsequent alignment of the divisions, and the postseason arrangement, but if you notice, I picked the most logical choices for all in regards to potential fanbase and overall revenue on all accounts. Also, this is my world and I will do as I see fit.

So, you think you can do better? What would you do, if given unlimited money and power? Which cities would you expand to? Or, would you contract, and if so, who would you eliminate, and why? Can you do better than me? Show me what you're playing ball with!

An Auditory Look at Bond

2009-09-06T21:30:00.013-04:00

(Editor's note: I originally posted this on my MySpace profile back on Nov. 23, 2008, right after seeing the latest Bond movie, Quantum of Solace. This is a reposting of that blog entry as I created it then; I thought about tweaking it, but after careful deliberation, I decided I was right the first time around. This is the first in a series of posts I'll be transferring once in a while to this more visible arena. Now, sit back and enjoy all its retroness!)

So, I went and saw Quantum of Solace last night. If you've been living under a rock or in a cave for the last 5 years, EON has told us that these last two Bond movies (Casino Royale came out in 2006) starring Daniel Craig, are not prequels, but a "retelling" of the 007 franchise Ian Fleming so lovingly wrote 40 years ago, and Albert Broccoli so carefully produced for 30 years. I went in with such low expectations that I was just pleasantly surprised that 007 wasn't given amnesia and forced to retrace his steps to figure out who did it to him and take them down (a la the Bourne trilogy, which looks like they're trying to do after the utterly-boring Casino).

However, I'm not writing my review on this movie; as my friend Kevin will tell you, I'm "an idiot with movies". That being said, if you want a movie review, go see his blog. I'm writing today, not about the James Bond we see, but the one we hear. Every Bond movie has some good core elements (something the masterminds of this "retooling" have seem to forgotten...mostly): a suave, cool, and collected protagonist (aka 007); a cliched, yet campy and well-loved, saying or two (quick fact: did you know that martinis are really never shaken? If you did that, it becomes a watered-down mess. Basically, James was a lightweight with his alcohol and tried to hide it!); a Bond girl with a borderline R-rated name (Plenty O'Toole was pretty tame, though); and a really cool theme song for the time frame in which the film was set.

And that last one is the subject of this post today. There have been 22 Bond films to date, and 21 original songs (Dr. No was the only one to use the official Bond theme song as its movie song as well), so I think it's time to do a "Best of..." list. I'm sure there's some out there much more well-known (and better written) than mine, but fuck it! You're here, so might as well do it. Keep in mind, I'm not rating the movies, or even how the opening sequences were filmed; I'm only gonna rate the song itself. So, without further ado:

10.) "Moonraker" - Dame Shirley Bassey (from Moonraker)

Before you quit on this list already, remember what I said: I'm not judging the movies; that's Kevin's job. Mine is to judge the songs, and as far as the theme songs go, this one just beat out Quantum of Solace's "Another Way to Die" for this spot. With the vocals of Bassey, and the down-tempo sensation of floating through space, it fit into the theme of the movie precisely...even if the movie was pretty cheesy. (Another quick fact: Dame Bassey is the only person to sing the theme for more than one Bond film. One more is on my Top 10, but the one that missed the cut was "Goldfinger" for - you guessed it - Goldfinger)

9.) "A View to a Kill" - Duran Duran (from A View to a Kill)

EON has (almost) always chosen acts to do their themes that were super-popular at the time. You had Tom Jones in '65, Lulu in '74, Sheena Easton in '81, and Madonna in '02, so why should 1985 be any different. Duran Duran just came off their multi-platinum album Rio a few years earlier, and were still riding high. And this theme sounded like something that came off that album: lots of synth, big vocals, and a funky bass line make this the epitome of the '80s pop-rock scene.

8.) "Tomorrow Never Dies" - Sheryl Crow (from Tomorrow Never Dies)

Being a folksy rocker chick would usually exclude you from being picked for being the "artist-of-record" for a moment in time, yet she somehow pulls it off well; she doesn't let the big orchestra drown her out and makes sure you hear her loud and clear, yet doesn't strain to make it known. From the catchy hook, to the bluesy beat, this song works.

7.) "On Her Majesty's Secret Service" - John Barry (from On Her Majesty's Secret Service)

George Lazenby's only role was under-appreciated. Maybe that was because it was less action and more love story, or because Blomfeld's actor changed, showing the first flaw with the series. Possibly moreso, it's not well-received because Lazenby chose to leave after this one movie, thereby adding to the psyche that he believed his own performance was bad, so why should they like it; this, of course, was not the case. But in forgoing this movie, you miss a dark and sinister opening theme that fits perfectly into the sentiment of this film. (Now, I'll probably receive the most criticism from this one because some will argue "this wasn't the official theme of that movie." And, actually, they would be right. The official theme song was Louis Armstrong's "We Have All the Time in the World", which was a fantastic song and could be higher on the list. However, this song was played at the end, during the ending credits, and as that's completely out of character with a Bond theme, it won't be counted on this list.)

6.) "You Know My Name" - Chris Cornell (from Casino Royale)

With the "retooling", Bond was meant to be edgier, grittier, and more of a bad-ass and less refined; Chris Cornell fits this criteria perfectly. From Audioslave and Soundgarden fame, Cornell has always been one of my favorite rock singers, and he proves why here. With mainstream lyrics (the title's not forced into the lyrics) and a killer guitar riff, this song can be played on hard rock stations and no one would think twice and crank it up. Yet, it retains the big orchestra and larger-than-life sound needed for a good Bond theme.

5.) "Nobody Does It Better" - Carly Simon (from The Spy Who Loved Me)

Carly Simon has always been an intriguing singer. People still ask her to this day who "You're So Vain" is about (to which she doesn't reply), and it has been used in dozens of movies and sampled by Janet Jackson. Same goes with "Nobody", even though most people don't remember it's from a 007 film anymore. Turn on any soft-pop station in the country, and you can be assured this song is in their rotation. It has stood the test of time because it's not directly about Bond or the movie (though "the spy who loved me" is forced into the song rather awkwardly), and has the same elements of her other music: slightly funky, slightly folky, and plenty of piano. Any song with this much staying power in the mainstream is good in my book.

4.) "Diamonds Are Forever" - Dame Shirley Bassey (from Diamonds Are Forever)

They say the ultimate compliment is to be ripped off, and that's especially true when it's someone as famous as Kanye West. Some people shrug it off, while most others sue. Dame Bassey not only was flattered, but offered the "usurper" more of her library. This is such a big song, and she's such a big voice, that it's easy to see why West would do such a thing for his song "Diamonds from Sierra Leone". Her powerful pipes constantly fight for control of the song from the orchestra, and it's a beautiful grudge match. Funky, jazzy, and loud, this song is sweet intoxication.

3.) The World Is Not Enough - Garbage (from The World Is Not Enough)

How does a rock band from Wisconsin become one of the biggest bands in the world then become a relic of the Grunge Age, only to come back and perform the Bond theme, which is inherently neither grunge nor rock? That's Garbage, the epitome of the Bond franchise; an evolutionary band pretty much capable of staying relevent in an ever-changing world. I firmly believe Shirley Manson wouldn't be on Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles if it wasn't for this glorious comeback. If you close your eyes and listen to the theme, (as their music video suggests) it feels like your watching a massive Broadway musical; there's enough brass and string instruments to rival the Met, and it's completely over-the-top...just the way any good Bond movie should be.

2.) "Goldeneye" - Tina Turner (from Goldeneye)

Who ever thought that Tina Turner was still relevant enough to be the Bond singer in 1995, 6 years after her last studio album, Foreign Affair, was a sheer genius. She has the look (though you don't see her in the film - another quick fact: Sheena Easton and Madonna are the only two singers in their respective films - Easton seen singing in the opening credits of For Your Eyes Only and Madonna having a cameo in Die Another Day) and the sultry voice to pull it off, and that - like Garbage's 1999 appearance - re-sparked her career at a time when the world thought she was done. Though I'm not rating them, this was, by far, my favorite opening sequence; with all the analogies to the fall of the Soviets (this being the first post-Cold War Bond) and the funky, sexy, and big song attached, this is the best definition of how a Bond opening should be.

1.) "Live and Let Die" - Wings (from Live and Let Die)

Can you name any other Bond song so relevant, so fresh, and so remade after 35 years? Large crescendos, sing-along lyrics ("You know you did, you know you did, you know you did"), a great riff, and a former Beatle - what more can you ask for? This takes the typical Bond orchestra, gives it a shot of adrenaline, puts tons of pyrotechnics in the room and ignites them, and still has time to have a Monty Python moment ("and now, for something completely different") by creating a catchy hook with a completely different tempo - in case you're about to make a fool of yourself and bust into air guitar. This song makes every other Bond theme seem like they were created to put insomniacs to bed; it's in-your-face and unapologetic. While the movie was good, though not great, the theme was, by far, the best ever created for a Bond. Listen to your classic rock station; I bet you hear this version in the rotation once in a while. (But don't talk to me about the Guns N' Roses version, that was garbage! Hey, I never said the covers were any good.) The chances of anyone making one to dethrone this theme have gone up with the "grittier", "edgier" Bond, and while I love both The White Stripes and Alicia Keys, EON really needs to try harder to find someone who can do it.

So, there you have it. For shiggles, I'll leave you with the rest of the list; consider them my "honorable mentions" as they were good in their own rights, just not the pinnacle of the franchise:

11. "Another Way to Die" - Jack White and Alicia Keys (from Quantum of Solace)
12. "From Russia With Love" - John Barry (from From Russia With Love)
13. "The Living Daylights" - a-ha (from The Living Daylights)
14. "All Time High" - Rita Coolidge (from Octopussy)
15. "Licence to Kill" - Gladys Knight (from Licence to Kill)
16. "The Man with the Golden Gun" - Lulu (from The Man with the Golden Gun)
17. "Die Another Day" - Madonna (from Die Another Day)
18. "Thunderball" - Tom Jones (from Thunderball)
19. "Goldfinger" - Dame Shirley Bassey (from Goldfinger)
20. "You Only Live Twice" - Nancy Sinatra (from You Only Live Twice)
21. "For Your Eyes Only" - Sheena Easton (from For Your Eyes Only)

What Would Jimbo Do? (An Occassional Feature)

2009-08-01T19:59:00.006-04:00

Greetings and salutations, my virtual friends. I'm not feeling myself today, so instead of taking meds or getting sleep like I feel like I probably should, I'm instead going to eat Spinach Alfredo pizza with chicken and bacon, forgo all modesty and write this half-naked, and pretend you give a damn about my ideas, because - as you know - I rock! The way this occasional works is simple: I pick one thing going on in the world, no matter how large, controversial, or trivial, and tell you what I, as King of Everything Existing, Gone, and Yet-to-Be-Created, would do. I promise not to go over three paragraphs for the idea, and you're welcome to pelt me with comments/suggestions/questions - or, if you prefer, snowballs. So, without further ado, let the fun begin!

Today's subject: Making an east-west freeway in Pinellas County - Change, no matter how hard people try to fight it, is good for everyone. Things need to change and adapt to survive, and whole people will try and resist, you need to figure out when the change is beneficial and ignore the naysayers or when the vocal opposition is correct. Here's what I think will help St. Pete, and the rest of southern Pinellas County, become much more conveniently attractive to out-of-towners as it deserves to be without demolishing everything in its path:

Build a 4th east-west Tampa Bay high-level crossing, utilizing I-175 via tunnel from right before 4th St S to a man-made island just east of Albert Whitted Airport, that can accommodate commuter rail. With respect to the high water-table, the tunnel can be built the same way as the New River Tunnel is built in Fort Lauderdale so water can't seep in. Charge a toll so the Sunshine Skyway Bridge doesn't suffer from "shunpiking", but something reasonable to make it attractive ($2 eastbound only), and have it connect to I-75 near Apollo Beach. Remove the exit at 6th St, use that space to build a westbound exit to 8th St, and have exits to 4th St (EB) and 3rd St (WB) (a la Boston's Big Dig) to the west of the bridge.

Extend I-175 westward toward the beaches along the 5th St S corridor. Instead of uprooting people's lives, however, use the Big Dig as an example again and bury the freeway under the city. Exits to access this freeway would be available at 22nd St S, 34th St S, and 49th St S, before it turns northwest toward it's final destination. In the meantime, the 1st Ave N/S twins would have access, as well as 5th Ave N. The freeway would reemerge on Tyrone Blvd, which would be turned into a freeway from 9th Ave N all the way to the current freeway-style interchange to Madeira Beach; exits would be provided at today's major intersections: 22nd Ave N/66th St N, 38th Ave N, Park St N, and the Bay Pines VA. Access to others addresses would be provided by frontage roads. The light on the Tom Stuart Causeway would also be removed, as well as raising the drawbridge to eliminate most openings.

There, problem solved. See? That wasn't insanely painful, was it? Again, this is only occasional (read: when I get a bug up my ass), so I can't tell you when or what the next one will be. All I can do is invite you to leave a comment. So, get down on it!

The (Slow Spinning) Return of the King

2009-07-26T19:08:00.010-04:00

So, it was brought to my attention that I was a bit of a dork. I'm obsessed with music and music history in what some people (*coughkevincough*....excuse me, something in my throat) consider an "unhealthy obsession". Sure, do I love experiencing music for all its richness? Yeah. Do I enjoy many different genres and appreciate the ones I'm not as fond of? Absolutely. Do I think something is missing from music today, not in its performance, but in its presentation? Yeah, but I couldn't figure it out until recently.

Apparently, though, I'm not the only one like that. Something I never thought I'd say again in my lifetime, but I'm more than ecstatic to shout it from the rooftops: LP (or for the younger generation - oh...my...God, I sound old as fuck! - vinyl records) sales, both units and dollars, have increased more than 120% from 2007 to 2008. This in an industry that has seen a contraction of about 25% year-to-year on its overall physical media (CDs, cassettes, music videos). While those promising numbers are nowhere near the figures posted by the virtual world (1.11 billion digital units to a measly 2.9 million LPs), this does represent a subtle change in how people want to hear the music, not just listen to it.

Let's go back to the beginning for just a moment. Thomas Alva Edison invented a bagillion things; everything from today's X-ray machine you find at your doctor's office to the stock ticker is thanks to him (and contrary to popular opinion, he didn't create the light bulb; he perfected it and made it long lasting so it could be mass-produced for consumption), as well as the "kinetoscope" (the precursor to the movie theater), the carbon telephone transmitter (the part you spoke into on corded phones...do people still have those?), and the electric generation plant.

However, one of his greatest inventions came about accidentally. He was looking for a way to record telegraphs so they could be "read" automatically and transmitted by telephone to the recipient - that an ingenious idea in and of itself - when he found a way to record and play back sounds instead of dashes and dots. There were other contraptions before his, but none were practical. His "graphophone" was born, consisting of a grooved tin-foil cylinder and a stylus. This later evolved, by other forward-thinking people, into the "phonograph", and for much of the 20th Century, it was the only way - other than live - most people would get their auditory pleasure. Whether it be in the form first depicted by RCA with Nipper listening intently to his master's voice (real dog, BTW) or the turntables attached to amps and equalizers of the '60s, the record, for intents and purposes, was king.

We became a car-crazed culture in the '50s and '60s with the new-found fortunes we had gained at the end of World War II, the advent of the Interstate Highway System, and Jack Kerouac's beatnik manifesto On the Road. We wanted to experience the wind in our hair, the sights not attainable on the old rural roads, and the unbridled feeling of being free - all while listening to our music. Sure, we had radios in our cars, but there were plenty of parts in this vast nation that simply didn't have the population to merit such expenditures like a radio station for people who would most likely never pay for their programming. Also, people wanted to create their own soundtrack, not one given to them across the airwaves. So, we tried everything we could to attach our beloved record players into our newly-beloved cars. When they managed to succeed, they failed. The major flaw with records: they skip sections of music when the stylus, which is on the record by pure gravity, loses contact with the vinyl.

Thus begins the dethroning of King Vinyl. Sure, it was slow and, as is always the case in situations where something as iconic as an LP loses practicality, not without backlash. The first practical attempt to make music portable came on the scene in 1964 with the 8-track. This was a popular medium for about 10 years, when the compact cassette - even though first developed before the 8-track in 1963 - burst onto the scene and chipped away at even the venerable LP.

By the mid '80s, the new kid - and new king, having overtaken LPs as the preferred medium of music for the first time since the days of Edison - on the block was now in danger of itself being overthrown by the threat called the compact disc. The CD was the ultimate in portability: high-quality digital sound, thinner size, and - for the first time - one-button pushing to jump from one song to the next. No more pushing fast forward and hitting play to see where you are if you reallllllllly need to listen to that certain song. The CD easily became champ in the early '90s, and stayed that way until the music industry found a way to eliminate the physical medium altogether: the MP3.

As I type this post, I'm listening to my iTunes right now (Yesterday by The Beatles just came on, and London Bridge by Fergie was just on, and All Your Reasons by Matchbox Twenty before that, in case you were curious), so I'm just as guilty as the next guy of buying into the digital media hype. In fact, digital music sales surpassed physical media two years ago for the first time and it continues to explode. The reasons are justified: iPods and other players are cheaper and more prevalent than just 5 years ago, instant gratification of having "that song", and no longer are you chained to buy the whole album - or pay the insane price for CD singles - if you only like one song. However, with all digital media, something magical is lost.

That something is the sound quality and the fidelity. Where the MP3 - and even, to a lesser extent, the CD and cassette - lacks is a process to make the music readable called "compression". It's not an evil plot by the music industry to sabotage the consumer, but in order for you to hear it with any clarity, some of the fidelity is lost. Instruments and sounds are lost in the translation, and it can cause the song to not be heard as it was intended. It's the biggest limitation with the digital format, and the reason vinyl did not, as predicted, die.

This phenomenon proves that LPs are still a viable media. For their clarity and richness, LPs are here to stay, even as a niche. However, all three (excluding the nearly-departed cassette) mediums are, despite their outward appearance of competition, complimentary to each other as all of them serve a specific purpose. LPs are great for their sound and, nowadays, nostalgia and novelty, but unless you want to listen to an entire album start to finish or go to the turntable after every song and try to find the hard-to-see "gaps" signifying the end of one track and the beginning of another, they're not practical.

CDs are great for making up those short-comings, and they're both recordable and portable, too. As any college kid or teenager can attest, road trips are naturally more fun with a stack of CDs; plus, they sound the best in a car since most car audio systems are built today specifically to account for the acoustics needed for CDs. Their drawback is while portable, they're not meant for physical activities like running, hiking, or anything involving great human exertion, since the CD, like the LP, can skip if mishandled.

MP3, while having the worst sound of the three, is the most convenient. You can have seemingly endless playlists with any combination of music you would like and, with a music player, take it anywhere you go. No need to worry about jogging too hard and causing a skip, as it's all digital now. But, what is gained in utility is lost in playback (as discussed above).

I own about 140 CDs and over 1400 MP3s (about 500 or so are from said CDs), and plan on investing in a turntable soon. Do I own any records? No, but with all the garage sales lately with people trying to make ends meet, I can help my fellow neighbors by taking their (gently-used) vinyl off their hands. Also, stores like FYE and Best Buy are getting back in the LP game, with a surprising amount of new titles available on vinyl. (However, buy local and support your local record store; Google it if you don't know where they are. They have great deals, up-to-date selections, and are super-knowledgable on all genres.) Personally, I will only buy LPs I know I would listen to in entirety, but that doesn't mean you should take my advice on that. Hell, if I find Rhythm of Youth for $1 somewhere, I'd spend it just to see if my friends really do dance.

A Feeling Like Floating?

2009-07-20T18:51:00.009-04:00

Hi everyone! How've you been? Yeah, I suck as a friend and at anything involving ambition as evidenced by the lack of a blog posting in more than a week. Blame it on my annoyance with computers after being at work on one for 9 hours straight, my constant lack of ideas, or something else, but I resolve to do a little better. It may not be as gung-ho as I planned on - once a day - but I'm going to do one at least 2 or 3 times a week. One day, I'll get back on track. But until then, you'll just have to deal with it.

So, if you're in China (or on The Onion's new staff of great fish mongers) on Wednesday, look to the heavens that the Great Chairman has provided you. Also, bring your pendulum and suction-cup boots with you, because, according to The Times of India - India's, and the world's, largest English-language paper - gravity may actually drop in the area affected by a total eclipse.

You read that right, ladies and gentlemen; it is believed that, because the Moon separates the Earth from the Sun for any length of time, gravity's hold on us is less than normal. "Old wives' tale" or "nut-job conspiracy theorists" is probably your first thought, as it was mine, despite the fact it made it into one of the most-respected papers in the history of the world. "Must be a fluke, I thought," much like the numerous times a caller "Baba Booey-ed" FOX News. However, I did my homework and found this isn't the first time this was suggested; in fact, it's been suggested since at least the '50s that pendulums are affected by the total eclipse. Apparently, the pendulum changes direction violently during a total solar eclipse, and the theory goes as such: since gravity is constantly pulling the pendulum toward the Earth, that constant struggle between gravity and Newton's laws is what keeps it swinging in the first place; because of this, gravity - it seems - must be the culprit to cause those outbursts.

(Side rant: since the most scientific-type of pendulum swings based on a combination all three of Newton's laws of physics and his postulation of gravity, it's a pity it's named after some French guy who used Newton's ideas to come up with the idea the Earth rotates - in 1851, about 2000 years after Ptolmey and Hipparchus figured it out (just so the stupid and brash Europeans could become feudal lords and serfs and forget it until Galileo rediscovered it for them in the early 1600's; thankfully, though, the Indians and Arabs archived those works so they could focus on other things during the Medieval phase, like the concept of zero, perfecting algebra, and universities.) without anyone telling them. Anyway, back to your reguarly scheduled post.)

So, this has lead to the largest test of that theory to date. Hundreds of test sites are set up all over China throughout the "eclipse zone", all with both gravimeters and, in case they don't work like in 1999, backup Foucault pendulums. Since this will be a six-and-a-half minute eclipse, the longest we'll ever experience in our lifetimes, it should be sufficient time to figure out, once and for all, if that light-headedness you experience while day turns into night isn't just you and it really is your head trying to separate from your body.

Therefore, if you're looking for an excuse to not go into work on Wednesday, you can always say you've Velcro'ed yourself to your bed so you don't float off into space. In fact, you can even forward them the link to the story showing it's not just hogwash. However, be forewarned that if your boss has at least some common sense, they'll know the gravity-challenged area of the Earth will be on the other side of the globe from your cushy desk job in Center City and won't buy it for a minute. But let me know if it works; I'll use it for the next total eclipse in July 2010, when it's at least in the Western Hemisphere (Chile and Argentina, in case you were wondering), if they do buy it.

- Photos courtesy of (in order): NASA, flickr, ETFTrends.com, and University of Wisconsin - Madison.

Shooting Blanks

2009-07-09T08:46:00.004-04:00

I've been scarce lately. It's not intentional, as I truly do want to write for the 4 people that have bookmarked my page, as well as myself. However, I really am at a loss lately for topics to discuss. I don't want my blog to be a regurgitation of other blogs, which in and of themselves are also regurgitations of others blogs. I don't want to be an RSS-proxy of news topics, either. As my orange juice post shows, I can find (relatively) fresh and original ideas to talk about. In spite of that, I am at a loss lately.

So, it's time for more (in deep movie announcer voice) "audience participation-tion-tion-tion!" With that in mind, what topics can you think of for your man Jimbo? The only rule is it has to have some connection to the Delaware Valley, the Tampa Bay area, and/or baseball. Hopefully, you guys can throw some stuff my way soon!

Extolling Our Independence

2009-07-05T10:28:00.005-04:00

So, yesterday was our Independence Day. It's a day when we celebrate becoming the first long-lasting democracy in the world since the Roman Republic was dissolved in favor of making Gaius Julius Caesar dictator perpetuo. Sure, there were other attempts at a government "by the people, for the people," or societies that had some qualities of democracy between 41 BC and 1776 AD, but none of them gave such broad freedoms* to every citizen† as the founding fathers eventually did. But contrary to popular opinion, the Declaration of Independence didn't give us our freedoms; it was more of a complaint-laden diatribe against His Highness, the mentally unstable George III of the UK, and why we needed to kick his government to the curb. The Constitution codified those "truths" we held "to be self-evident;" the Declaration was just the jumping point to plant the seeds of freedom.
(*-the right to vote limited to only White men 21+ years old until 1865 for all races, until 1920 for women, and until 1971 for 18+ year olds;
†-3/5 of a citizen if you were Black or Indian before 1865)

Obviously, freedom didn't come easy, nor was it free from speed bumps. It took a long time to get the hang of this "American experiment" known as a federal democracy. The original idea - and the core argument behind the Civil War - was each State had precedent over the central government; this philosophy was endorsed in the Articles of Confederation. Needless to say, that failed, as we have the Constitution today. Then, the southern states tried to persuade Washington that was still the original intent of the rewritten Constitution and its 10th Amendment:

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

South Carolina decided that meant if it's not covered in the Constitution explicitly it was up the States to decide (i.e., slaves and secession). Well, that really didn't turn out how Columbia thought it would when Abraham Lincoln called their bluff, did it? It took four years and over 600,000 lives, but the power of the Union - and of the Constitution - remained in tact. Also, an interesting caveat came of it; the formation of a new state from an existing one. West Virginia remains, to this day, the only state formed because of a war.

Maine and Kentucky, however, were carved out of existing states without bloodshed. Kentucky asked the Virginia Assembly and the US House for permission to form its own government and control its own destiny, and permission was given; Maine came about due to the Missouri Compromise so the "Slave States" and "Free States" had the same power in the Senate, but more-or-less, it was the same premise - state wanted self-determination and luck had it they were more needed than they thought. So, it has been done in US history; it's not an unprecedented events by any means, though it is hard to do for sure.

So, in that same spirit, why is it every time either South Jersey or South Florida talk of secession from their states, they are laughed off - by the governor himself, no less? These are people who are seriously expressing their displeasure with their governments and - in the case of South Jersey - how they are represented in the Assembly. Culturally and economically, they are a world away from their counterparts in the north and it's time for them to be allowed to govern themselves.

South Jersey constitutes the counties of (from north to south) Camden, Gloucester, Atlantic, Salem, Cumberland, and Cape May. (Side note: I would be tempted to include Burlington and Ocean counties, as well, but a friend of mine from Ocean County considers himself to be from "Central Jersey", and using that logic, the people from Ocean and Burlington would be less likely to vote for such a proposal.) South Jersey could make its temporary capital in Glassboro (since it has the foreign policy experience and the state university, as well as plenty of access to the rest of the new state with Route 55 and US 322), with a possible move in the future to a more-centrally located built-from-the-ground-up city in either Salem or Cumberland counties.

South Florida, though different from some proposals, would be from the following counties southward: Citrus, Sumter, Lake, Seminole, Orange, and Brevard. The capital pro tempore would need to be either Port Charlotte or Vero Beach, as not to give any one city a political advantage over another (which is why Tallahassee was chosen, even though it is over 600 driving miles from its furthest in-state city, Key West). At some point, a new capital would need to be built more centrally - like near Lake Placid - but only when infrastructure could support it.

Now is the time to rise up and push these movements to fruition. The French didn't let the monarchy run them forever, the Mexicans didn't stay under Spanish rule, and the Indians threw the British out of their land. On this Independence Weekend 2009, let's exhibit the most basic of fundamental human rights, it's the first one they thought of when amending the Constitution: the freedom to protest peacefully. Remember, as Thomas Jefferson once said, "When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." Let's help the government remember that - non-violently, of course; I'll never condone that - in a democracy, we're in control. We want our own states and will do what we can to get them! Enough of being North Jersey's bitch and North Florida's bankroll! It's our time - it's our turn!

OK, if you read through my political rhetoric that long, you deserve a reward. Happy Independence Day everyone!

Phickle Phoridians and What They Say About Us

2009-06-26T11:38:00.000-04:00

So, I’ve had a terrible case of “writer’s block”, which is why I haven’t posted on this blog since my observation on the Supreme Court of Public Opinion case #2009-0618, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, musca domestica, et. al. vs. Barack H. Obama, President of the United States. Sometimes, however, life has a funny way of dropping something so pertinent to you right on your lap you’d be insane not to approach it. Thus, let me finish this paragraph by stating this: Kevin, I know you and I strongly recommend you look away from the rest of this blog now – you know what’s coming.

Tropicana Field: loathe it or love it, it is the home of the Tampa Bay Rays; has hosted, among others in its 19-year history, the following large-scale events: the largest one-night indoor concert in Florida, NCAA Men’s Final Four, the Davis Cup, the NHL Playoffs, ArenaBowl IX, and – oh yeah – the World Series; and, contrary to popular opinion, is centrally located near the population center of the Bay Area. So, why is it people can pack the Trop when it’s a “gala event” (like the playoffs, the World Series, or the raising of the banners), but when – God-forbid – you need to actually watch the game and not just sit in a seat and take pictures to say, “Look where I was!” the sea of blue you see on TV is not people, but empty seats? What possesses the people of Florida – not just Tampa Bay, as the same phenomenon is occurring in both Miami and Jacksonville – to be apathetic toward something so community-driven that other cities would kill to have?

Let’s first take a look at some of the excuses and see if they can’t be debunked. The biggest excuse that people – mainly from Tampa and to the northeast – have is the time and distance. As a St. Pete resident of 6 years, I can safely say that argument is a load of crap. The worst direction to travel during either rush hour is toward Tampa. The bridges feed into Tampa’s overworked, outdated road system that can’t handle normal everyday traffic. Add the 5-10,000 extra vehicles that will appear on the Howard Frankland, Gandy, or Courtney Campbell bridges during that rush – in which most games are played, and no one would make it leaving at 5:30pm from Pinellas to the stadium, irregardless of the placement in the city, by opening pitch without pushing start times past 7:30pm; it will be near impossible to have Bob DuPry’s office to sign off on that. So, until TBARTA gets going, no place in the area will be convenient enough for everyone.

Speaking of TBARTA, the next issue is its location in general. Having been built in downtown St. Pete, which most consider “isolated” from the area since it’s on a peninsula, makes it that much more impossible to break that impervious across Tampa Bay known as the Hillsborough/Pinellas county line. However, a new study the ABC Coalition published today in the St. Petersburg Times shows 5 different locations and the population within 30 miles of each. Downtown St. Pete has the least, but at 2,245,129, it is within 100,000 of the “top spot”, Downtown Tampa. Also, with TBARTA planning to build a transportation hub right near the Trop location that will make it easily accessible by rail from Clearwater, Tampa, Brandon, Plant City, Wesley Chapel, and possibly New Port Richey, and express busses from northern Pinellas, Bradenton, Sarasota, Brooksville, Crystal River, Lakeland, and all points in between, Downtown St. Pete just became that much more attractive. Granted, it’ll take 5 years – if started today – for the first signs of TBARTA’s impact, but seeing as it takes 3-4 years to build a stadium when you don’t have a billion dollars to throw around like the Yankees and Mets, you need to consider those transportation nodes in the final decision of stadium location.

While we’re talking bottomless bank rolls, let’s talk another favorite topic: dollars and “sense”. Everyone said the original deal to put it on the waterfront for $450 million was “too expensive.” However, those same people arguing it will cost too much also want a $471 million rehab of Tropicana Field. To that I quote Carlos Mencia: “DEE-Dee-dee!!!” Thanks for “protecting our wallets” on that one, POWW. So, according to citizens of Tampa, it either needs to be in Tampa, since it’s the “population center” (which it’s geographically not; including Bradenton and Sarasota, that distinction belongs about 83rd Ave N and 4th St N in St. Pete), or at the very north end of St. Pete so people from Tampa “don’t need to drive as far.” However, there’s no city- or county-owned land up in the Gateway area, as that area of St. Pete is known, that doesn’t require mitigation; same goes with Tampa. So, if Tampa or Gateway are the “prime spots,” why would we up the price of the stadium by up to $150 million in land acquisition and/or landfill mitigation costs just to kowtow to the demands of an extra 100,000? I don’t know about you, but an investment of up to $1.5 million per person for people who may never go to a game seems like wasted money.

Another issue is the play on the field. “Why should I support a team that is barely over .500?” I’ll give you one major reason why: we went to the World Series last year. How’s that for a “what have you done for me lately” retort? They have a winning record! They’re playing surprisingly well in spite of major injuries that took out, for some length of time, the following people (in no particular order): Chad Bradford, Scott Kazmir, Troy Percival, Jason Isringhausen, Jason Bartlett, Aki Iwamura, Evan Longoria, and Pat Burrell (I’m sure I forgot some along the way, too). That’s almost a whole freakin’ team on the DL! Yet they’re three games over .500 – something that would have seemed like a Godsend 2 years ago – and are still within reach of the AL East crown. Granted, in every other division, 38-35 would be good enough for at least 3rd (2nd in the AL Central and NL East), but this isn’t every other division, and I think that’s why the fans are very fickle. However, it’s not excuse. Here’s a list of teams with worse records than us (as of Wednesday) that have better attendance averages (in order of attendance, records and place in division in parentheses): Cubs (34-34, 3rd), Mets (36-34, 2nd), Astros (32-37, 5th), Rockies (37-35, 3rd), Mariners (36-35, 3rd), Twins (36-37, 2nd), D-Backs (30-42, 5th), Braves (34-37, 4th), White Sox (34-37, 3rd), Padres (31-39, 4th), Reds (34-36, 3rd), and Royals (31-39, 4th). In fact, we are one of only two teams that have winning records that are in the bottom 20 – the other being the Marlins (37-36, 3rd) at 29th. See? It’s not just Tampa Bay with the attendance issues.

And that brings me to the bigger issue: are we, as Phloridians (again, my blog, my spelling rules), apathetic to sports in general? The only team that has had no attendance issues anywhere in Phlorida was the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but that’s about to change with the loss of most of the season ticket holders due to the economy. So what is the root cause of it? What would create such an indifference to teams and franchises that areas like San Antonio, Portland, Hampton Roads, and especially Las Vegas are pushing hard to secure? Do we just, like the sun, sand, and surf, take them for granted that they’ll always be here? Or is it more of an inherent issue? I can honestly see the problem with hockey as a whole in the Sunshine State, as there is no history or pedigree throughout history here (one Stanley Cup doesn’t erase 70 years of isolation from the sport). However, football should be huge here, and it is: at the college level. The pro teams are struggling to fill seats; the Jags are on the verge of moving to Toronto (!) if revenue doesn’t pick back up, and with no naming rights to Jacksonville Municipal Stadium, I don’t foresee that happening in the near-term. The Dolphins are struggling in a tough division and can’t get enough people in the seats to expand the payroll and get better players. The Bucs’ waiting list evaporated almost overnight, and now they’re soliciting me to get a ticket package (just because I’m a Rays’ holder doesn’t mean I would support the team that embarrassed the Eagles in Philly twice in one year’s time). Baseball also has a long, storied history here, but mainly through Spring Training. But the excitement of March seems to quickly wear off as the attention spans of the natives get bored and move to the next big thing.

From this writer’s perspective, it seems like the main issue is Phlorida’s ingrained obsession with vanity. They do what they can, however they can, to be noticed. Look at South Beach as a prime example. In and of itself, it’s nothing more than a very nice beach town found at any oceanfront state (the Hamptons in New York, Avalon in New Jersey, Nags Head in North Carolina, Myrtle Beach in South Carolina, amongst many others). However, the rich and famous hang out there, songs like “Miami” by Will Smith celebrate it, and TV shows like “Burn Notice” make it a living, breathing character along side the cast. That’s why people feel the need to go to South Beach; not because the sand is made of gold or it houses the Fountain of Youth, but because they can be seen. Clearwater Beach has just as nice – if not better – beaches, and there’s just as much money in those condos as the condos on the other side of the state, but it’s not as glorified. Why? Because no one will see you there except for that tourist from Montreal. That’s why the Rays can sell out the playoffs, but can’t get rid of tickets for a World Series rematch. That’s why the Lightning set attendance records at the Thunderdome (now known as Tropicana Field) during the playoffs, but can’t get more than 7,000 people to attend an average game at the Forum (neé Ice Palace). That’s why the Jaguars haven’t sold out a game in almost a year, and the Magic, on their historic playoff run, couldn’t get a full house until the Finals. Unless people will notice you, Phloridians just can’t waste their time with trivialities like sports. But then, this argument doesn’t hold much water when, in California, the geographical center of vanity, the Dodgers and Lakers sell out games constantly, does it?

So, what is it? Why are sports as a whole, not just the Rays and their red-headed adopted son known as the Trop, neglected in this state? Why can a meaningless Spring Training series between the Rays and the Phillies in Philadelphia sell out (about 90K people over two games), but the same series in St. Pete with both teams fighting for position in their respective division can’t draw more than 60K people for three? What makes people spend more time in a bikini or swim trunks getting the early stages of melanoma instead of spending money on organizations that provide money and supplies to both youth and adult non-profit organizations alike? Why do we, as a state, demand new facilities and/or locations for these teams, only to shun them the same way we did before with the same tired excuses, just amended to fit the new situation?

As someone who loves sports, I can’t understand it. All I can understand is no matter where the Rays new stadium is built, be it Tampa, Downtown St. Pete, or an island in the middle of Tampa Bay with off ramps right off the Howard Frankland and hydrofoils from locations every 2 miles along the bay’s shoreline for those who don’t want to drive, some group will complain about the distance, the money, the team’s performance; you know, the same excuses that have been used for years. And that’s just how Phlorida is; nothing changes, no matter how many people you try to cater to.

Insane in the Membrane

2009-06-18T08:59:00.001-04:00

President Barack Hussein Obama is a murderer! The man who ran on a campaign of "peace" and "change" took an innocent life - on film, no less! - and laughed as the carcass of his fallen enemy lain there on the carpet. No trial, no jury, no judge. He was the law at that moment, and because this harmless being simply "got on his nerves", he slew the helpless fool in cold blood. He could have at least imprisoned and then set him free, but no; Obama said, "Damn the Constitution!" and took its life. This man is deplorable and should be executed.

That's what our resident whack-jobs over at PETA what you to think, anyway. Why now, you ask? Oh? Did you not see the footage? Well, let me show you:

That's right, ladies and gentlemen; your president, the one (don't debate me on this statement, I don't wanna hear it on this post!) doing his best to clean up the mess both George W. Bush and Bill Clinton put us in is being accused, not of the typical, "left-wing liberal commie" crap, but killing an "innocent" fly by your friends at the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. My, oh my, talk about an organization that has lost its meaning.

PETA was started in 1980 as an organization dedicated to make sure four key things were monitored: 1.) Hollywood didn't mistreat animals, 2.) the fur trade was stopped, 3.) animal testing was either humanely done or stopped altogether, and 4.) farm animals were kept out of deplorable conditions. However, since the beginning, their methodology on safeguarding their core values has always been controversial. Throwing paint on fur coats, harassing lab workers in the streets, and suing movie lots are just some of the stunts this group has performed.

Once they realized this garnered them attention (like they say, bad publicity is better than none at all), they started to expand into the realm of the absurd, like suggesting fishing is the same as sticking a hook in your dog's eye, or eating beef is equivalent to dining on a monkey. They have even chastised sports athletes such as Shane Victorino for eating Spam, a much-maligned (yet pretty decent if cooked right) food considered a staple in his native Hawaii. But now, I can truly say I've seen it all.

They are sending President Obama a "humane fly trap" so he can catch the annoying pest that is known to carry diseases such as typhoid, cholera, and dysentery, and release it back into the wild. They said he should not "glorify" the killing of any creature and, as a role-model, should "know better."

(Before I continue, I want to point out I'm not at all against "animal rights" - thought I don't like that term. I love dogs and cats, and nothing should ever happen to them, such as beatings, over breeding, and even neglect; it breaks my heart to see that. However, there are some animals humans have used as food for 10,000 years, and until the last 150, did it humanely. I agree that furs from chinchillas shouldn't be harvested simply for a coat; the whole chinchilla should be used, either as dog food or helping to feed the homeless. Same thing goes for seal pelts and any other creatures that are useful to everyone. Over-harvesting is bad, too, and that should be monitored, or some animals will go the way of the dodo. But don't bitch at me for eating venison or call me a "murderer" because I have an ivory chess set. So long as it's done in an ecologically-sane and humane manner, we're the top of the food chain and we have every right to act that way.)

So, here's a solution I think most people can agree with: because there is a major over-population issue with this planet (6.4 billion and growing) and we're trying to rid ourselves of the idiots roaming around, why not round up every card-carrying member of PETA and anyone who believes their BS, put them all on some secluded island out in the Atlantic that no one lives at now, and drop a nuke on them. Solves three issues: 1.) reduces the population, 2.) gets rid of whack jobs, and 3.) shows countries like North Korea and Iran what actually happens with a nuke (since they apparently didn't study WWII history and forgot about Hiroshima and Nagasaki) and that we're not afraid to use it again.

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I'll leave you on a happier, less depressing shameless plug. This one is brought to you by my man Hopper, who is writing his first-ever-paid movie column today. Show him some love and go check it out! It's about Hollywood's latest comedy, Year One, and since it has Jack Black, you know it's going to be a tongue-in-cheek, witty, intelligent comedy. Now, if you're in St Pete, get out there and enjoy this beautiful morning before it turns oppressive later today. Word is, it's supposed to be 96° again today, with a heat index approaching 110°. Hope the A/C's working at your place! And if you're in Philly right now, don't forget your umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh, cause it looks like it's gonna be on-and-off rain today. Stay cool/dry out there today!

Low-Speed Hijinx

2009-06-17T14:13:00.000-04:00

Greetings and salutations, everyone! Enjoy the Rays complete and utter domination over De La Rosa last night? Well, here's a little surprise for you out there who thought you'd never see this: Pat Burrell will (most likely) start in right tonight! Going 11-16 against tonight's starter for the Rockies, Aaron Cook, will kinda make you all that more valuable. Considering he's fresh from rehab and sporting the new porn-star goatee (which I will get a pic of...promise!), it hopefully will be a sign of things to come. David Price is on the mound tonight, hoping to rebound from a win that was more ugly than some losses I've seen (while only getting a 2.37 ERA, he threw 105 pitches in only 4 1/3 innings and giving up 6 walks, though he did have 6 Ks, too). He, like Pat the Bat, will come around in time, I'm sure.

So, did you hear? SEPTA, our friendly neighborhood mass transit system up in Philly (more like the TBARTA will be than PSTA is) looks like it was the butt of a joke recently, and they seem none too thrilled. According to today's Inquirer, sometime overnight the pranksters placed a sign - of high-quality and pretty authentic-looking, I might say - with the following text on many of SEPTA's main routes:

Courtesy: DesignPhiladelphia

"The Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority (SEPTA) is committed to providing non-discriminatory transportation services to all of its passengers, including schizophrenics, drug addicts, Irish Catholics, hipsters, homos, prostitutes, gentrifying transplants, raging maniacs, tourists, obnoxious Penn students, corner boys, pimps, drunk rich kids who still think Old City is cool, and terrified suburbanites who tremble with unease at the sight of everyone.
"Any person who is or seeks to be a patron of any SEPTA public vehicle shall be entitled to the same depressing experience of loud cell phones, obese people eating McDonalds, parents telling their toddlers to "Shut the Fuck Up!", and a constant inch-deep layer of urine-soaked trash and debris.

"No person or group of persons shall be discriminated against on any grounds with regard to routing, scheduling, or quality of transportation service furnished by SEPTA, with the following exceptions - race, color, socioeconomic status, and proximity to the suburbs.
"Any person who has experienced a cleaner, more efficient, more extensive, and better managed public transportation system in the U.S. (e.g. most if not all) can feel free to notify SEPTA about potential improvements, which shall promptly be ignored."

Apparently, these jokers have been practicing for a while, because they were able to get these pretty large signs up and under the protective glass where the advertisements usually peer upon said groups. Keep in mind I'm not easily offended, but from a practical joke standpoint, that was pretty damn funny! I can see why SEPTA would be offended, but let's face it; if they'd clean up the problems they're being lampooned over in the first place, this wouldn't be nearly as comical. But anyone who's ridden the El knows what I'm talking about: it's funny because it's true!

I'm not saying it's a bad thing, mind you, because those groups listed make it a diverse and interesting ride. In fact, I can't wait until TBARTA (God, I hope they change the name; that's a mouthful!) gets going and I can experience the atmosphere it will showcase. You really can't experience a region's true identity until you've taken a trip on its mass transit system, and seeing as we have really nothing here in Tampa Bay - except for sketchy, local bus-only companies like PSTA, HART, PCPT - tourists not only don't get the full extent of our rich culture and heritage, but they also get nowhere fast without renting a car.

(Side note and shameless plug for a fellow blogger: to get the full extent of what a mass transit system means to a region, check out the great piece my man Brad Maule over at PhillySkyline.com did on SEPTA and the Independence Pass. It gives you an idea of what I mean about mass transit showcasing the culture - both really good and brutally honest - of an area. Great work on that, Brad and the rest of the gang over there!)

So, do I think the "rapscallions" who did this deserve to be punished? If only for vandalism - since it is private property - and not anything regarding their "potentially offensive" language. Are they right about it? In a broad aspect, yes, but not to the level they took it. Is it hysterical? Abso-freakin-lutely! If I ever saw them on a train down here doing that, I wouldn't help them, but you're damn right I'd cheer them on! Everyone needs a good laugh once in a while, even at the expense of your self-dignity. Nothing's funnier than pointing out your own flaws, trust me.

Alright, kids. Two games tonight at the same bat times as last night, but different bat channel for the Phils - only outside the Delaware Valley and Greater Toronto, however - who play the Blue Jays (which, besides being a Phils phan, needs them to win so the Rays can take sole possession of 3rd) at 7:05 on ESPN (CSN in Philly, SNET in Toronto). The Rays play the Rockies again @ 8:40 EDT on Sun Sports in Tampa Bay/FSN in Denver. Speaking of the Mile-High City, if youre in the area, don't forget to get your free meal from Johnny's New York Pizza and Pasta Store in Lakewood; just wear your Rays blue & gold today only to get dinner on the house. Talk of food's making me hungry...you think they deliver to St. Pete?

- Big thanks goes out to Kevin Derrick over at DesignPhiladelphia for the SEPTA sign pic!

Come Back and Do the Trop

2009-06-16T08:06:00.000-04:00

No, this post is not about baseball (which, the Rays are in Denver tonight @ 8:40, and the Phils are hosting Canada's Last Hope @ 7:05, so watch them!), nor is it about the latest news regarding Tropicana Field's fate (which won't be mentioned at all on this blog until something substantial comes along, I promise); it's about Tropicana orange juice - that stalwart of breakfast tables across America - and advertising ideas gone horribly wrong. I know, an introspective on bad ideas not performed by myself is a departure for me too, but there's a first time for everything, right?

Today's Tropicana Products, a subsidiary of PepsiCo, started back in 1947, when Anthony Rossi moved from New York to Palmetto - just south of St. Pete on the other side of Tampa Bay - and started Manatee River Packing Company, a packing plant for fruit box gifts and fruits destined to be thrown on salads. Then, in 1952, he bought an old cannery in Bradenton, which is now the home of the Tropicana processing plant. The familiar "Tropicana" name game from their premium juice they provided, and the company took that name as their own in 1957. Pepsi bought them in 1998, and the rest is history.

For many years, they've had one of the most recognizable logos in advertising history: the fresh-picked orange, dew still dripping off of it, with a straw in it. It's meant to symbolize the freshness of the juice, as it really does taste fresh-squeezed. I, amongst millions of people daily, enjoy a cold glass of OJ in the morning (pulp-free, please!), and have grown to love that little orange being massacred with a plastic drinking utensil. Thanks for taking one for the team, little guy!

However, at the beginning of the year, PepsiCo committed its own "New Coke"-sized faux pas, changing that beloved death-by-straw orange into this:

Classy? I guess. Bland? Completely. Enticing? Meh, not really. It's just a glass of orange juice, nothing special or fancy. Now, if it came with its own champagne or vodka, I'd be more likely to buy it, but since mimosas and screwdrivers in the morning right before work could be hazardous both to your driving and career longevity, that's probably not the image you want to go for. And apparently Pepsi realize they messed up, too, because it was changed quickly thereafter back to the lovable, drinkable orange.

So, that brings me to the reason for this blog post: marketing failures. And this is where I ask for audience participation. Other than the "New Coke" fiasco, what big advertising "miscalculations" stick out in your mind? I'm curious to see what others consider an Epic Fail.

Alright, I'm outta here. Don't forget, the Phils are on CSN at 7:05 and the Rays are on Sun Sports at 8:40. Oh, and if you're out in Denver, don't forget to don your Rays gear and head out to Johnny’s New York Pizza & Pasta Shop in Lakewood tomorrow to get your free meal, since the Rays still made it to the World Series. See? The Rays may not have won, but they're still honored across the country for being bad-ass last year!

Monday Musings

2009-06-15T10:34:00.001-04:00

Welcome to Monday Musings, a weekly section dedicated to pretty much anything that comes to my mind at random - which, if you know me, is pretty much like everything else I do.

How'd the weekend treat you? You see the Rays get their first 5-game win streak this season? Believe it or not, they're not doing that badly, considering they were only 7 games over .500 at the All-Star Break last year. The Phils also were able to get a win against those baastids from Boston, which the Rays desperately needed. (Speaking of, get ready for strictly-baseball talk 6/23-25...you know why!) Did anyone else see Pat Burrell sporting the goatee? Am I the only one who finds it a tad pornstar-ish and not really meant for him to wear? It was like the one time I tried to do that; God, it was awful! Some people just aren't meant to have facial hair, and that's a truth I accepted. As soon as your MC finds a pic of Pat the Bat as Ron Jeremy, you know he'll be posting it.

(Speaking of, I'm diligently trying to find a special gift for everyone to view. I'll let you know should I get my hands on it. If not, I'll put out a public appeal, but let's see where this road goes first. Stay tuned....)

Did anyone see the news this morning? Apparently, in our mayoral race here in St. Pete - the only election I've see that has more candidates than can fit on one webpage - one of the leading candidates, Deveron Gibbons, was endorsed by Gov. Charlie Crist. I'm going to keep my opinions to myself for right now on whom I endorse (I'll wait until the primary's closer), but I am going to question the logic behind accepting that nod. Gov. Crist, while once popular with more than 70% of the electorate, has since dropped to 62% since he decided to forgo a second term and run for US Senate, as well as sign SB 360, which basically reduces restrictions of development allowing urban density to be much larger than the road around it has the capacity for it. Basically put, a 12-story condo could be put on a 2-lane road and not need to expanded. That is not what Florida should, or can, become. So, while remains to be seen whether this endorsement will help or hurt Gibbons' campaign, I do know that his campaign now has that controversy attached to it, and that's not what he needs when running against a field of people that size. You need to stand out for the right reasons, and controversy's not it.

Alright, that's about enough musing for one Monday. Rays are off today, heading to Colorado, even though we're supposed to be playing the NL East this year and we won't be meeting the Braves, and so are Phils, who play Toronto at home tomorrow. Taking a cue from one of my friends, I'm gonna yank on YouTube and leave you with a special news bulletin:

You stay classy, St. Pete/Philly/wherever you call home.

Jumping In Head-First: A Primer

2009-06-14T11:00:00.000-04:00

Alright, it looks like it's time to join the rest of the blogosphere and leave behind the random ramblings I posted on MySpace and make it happen on a more visible, "socially-acceptable" service. The reason I say it that way is because a friend of mine was dissuaded from reading my past rants and diatribes simply because it was on that site. There's nothing wrong with that train of thought, mind you, as I haven't been on MySpace in a while, and I've noticed a lot of my friends haven't, either. So, at some point, I'll migrate them over here for your viewing pleasure. You can see that they were helping me with an apparent evolution of my writing from - in retrospect - relatively crude and unrefined to...well, you be the judge.

I'm sorry, I didn't even introduce myself properly. My name's Jimbo and I'll be your MC for what I hope will be one of your bookmarks. If not, then I'll know for certain that I suck at writing and I'll go back to road tripping, which I know I'm good at. I'm a no-holds-barred kind of person and I expect, and look forward to, comments and discussions in the same light. I'm not easily offended, and because of that, I probably will offend unintentionally. Remember it's purely unintentional and I'll buy you a beer later to show you I still like you.

The topics discussed on this small slice of cyberspace will be like my personality: random, yet passionate. As the title implies, it'll do mainly with the goings-on of both my home region, the Delaware Valley, and the my current biosphere, Tampa Bay. Nothing is off-limits: sports, politics, happenings, history, and some broader topics, like music and national/international issues that affect us all. I know what you're thinking: "Jesus, not another one of these wackos that think he needs to be heard since the Adriana Huffington's and Perez Hilton's of the world got famous from it!" And you would be right. I mean, would anyone give a crap about any blogs at all if it wasn't for them (amongst better countless others), as reviled as they may or may not be, would the weblog be as popular as it is today? But am I doing this to be rich and famous? Hardly, as there are much easier ways: robbing banks and being a high-class mack/madam in large cities come to mind. I'm doing it for the same core reason each and everyone of us does this: because we can. Who said philosophy had to be complicated?

Here's where I have to give credit where credit is due, so you can skip to the next paragraph if you're not listed (warning: I'm just listing their nicknames - in no particular order, just the order I think of them - so no sappy emotional stuff needed nor warranted; I didn't just win a Grammy®, after all):
My Mom, who's a lot like Eileen Ripley, heroine of the Alien Quadrillogy
Hopper
Rabid Nick/Impoetry
B-Love
Richie Poo
Zombie Princess
Tonilicious
Becky
and anyone else I may have missed

That should about cover it today. Your MC has to leave for work soon, but he encourages you to watch both the Rays beat up the oh-my-God-can't-anyone-euthanize-them-and-spare-their-misery Nationals in St. Pete and the Phils and Red Sox slug it out yet again on South Broad Street; both games are on at 1:35pm today, so get your picture-in-picture ready and root, root, root for your home team - whichever one it may be. For me, I'm still debating that dilemma in my head.